Mike's Cyberspace Ramblings

Making My "Case"

2011-11-28T09:02:00.002-05:00

For a long time I have wondered, "What's with some people typing postings and other things all in lower case letters?" It always aggravates me when I see that. It really aggravates me when I see it on web sites where there are people's names on memorials on Findagrave.com which are used for genealogical research and they are either all in lower case letters or their middle initial is. I'm so used to using proper case, that even when the rare times I chat on Facebook I always use the proper capitalization for sentences and names and so do all the people my age. Obviously it is a result of those my age that learned English long before computers and texting. It is in our genes.

One day it finally hit me. I have never texted nor ever intend to. I'm assuming that when one sends a text that there is no way to make capital letters. I'll have to defer to someone who does text to answer that. That would indeed explain how people get into that habit. I sure wish they would change gears and use the proper case when not texting. This leads me to another paradox. When people have a cell phone wouldn't it be a whole lot easier just to talk to someone as opposed to sending a text with those tiny keyboards? I don't think I could even send a text if I wanted to since my fingers are so large. Oh well, another mystery to add to my growing list.

Oh, by the way, as long as I'm on the subject... It is also a mystery to me why there are so many spelling errors in things like newspapers, etc. that I'm sure are created by word processors that have spell check. Consequently, I can never understand why people don't use it when they publish things with such obvious spelling errors.

Is it just me, or has the world passed me by? I suspect the former as opposed to the latter.
8>}

A "Boring" Time

2011-08-30T12:28:00.002-04:00

My goodness! This is the 2nd entry I've made in only 2 weeks! Indeed, the wonders never cease! I'm just killing time until my after lunch dentist appointment. I've already made myself a nuisance on Facebook, so I thought I'd make myself a nuisance here until the appointment time.

I'm probably one of the few people my age who still have their original teeth, which is a miracle in itself considering how I've seriously abused them my whole life. Every time I go to see my dentist I always request her to pull all of my teeth and get me dentures. Of course she always tells me I should keep my teeth. I think having dentures is very beneficial because if there's any problems, I can just drop them off at the dentist and come and pick them up later. Hopefully in the mean time I wouldn't get an obsessive uncontrollable urge for rock candy or jaw breakers and such.

It's ironic that as many years as I have been going to her that she always asked me if I take Novocaine. My answer is always the same, "Yes, unless you want to scrape me off the ceiling the first time you touch any tooth." I also always make a song request for her to try and find, "Comfortably Numb" by Pink Floyd. She always laughs but I'm never sure if she actually forgets my wise crack or is just being polite. I'd like to think her memory is getting as bad as mine and she thinks it's the first time she has ever heard it.

Well, it's getting close to the time I must leave. It's ironic that going to a dentist is that you pay a lot of money for something you neither like or want. I'll just add that to my list of hundreds or life's ironies I will never understand.....
Later...

Bumper Stickers Revisited...

2011-08-15T14:50:00.006-04:00

My goodness! I noticed that the last time I posted on here was April! I guess my New Year's Resolution to post more Blog stuff is found lacking.

Well, let's see what fascinating entry I can conger up. I recently acquired another one of my all time favorite vehicles, (other than a 1957 Ford which stems from my Baby Boomer genes). I have another Ford Ranger. It's a 2001 with just over 100,000 miles which is low for a 2001 Ranger. Now I have my 2 favorite modern vehicles: a Jeep Wrangler and a Ford Ranger. Now I can haul bags of horse feed in the truck bed and not in the rear of the Jeep. I love the smell of molasses horse sweet feed, but all the little pieces of oats and corn that amass on the rear Jeep carpet were getting aggravating.

Now I (finally) come to my main thesis of this Blog post. Shortly after I got the truck, I went out to find a bumper sticker for it. I seem to have a bumper sticker compulsion, (so what's one more).

Freshly applied bumper sticker on my Ranger (A reminder of my Navy days)

I wrote a story about bumper stickers on my web site a few years ago. I can just save time and post the link so I can keep this entry short. HEE HEE. The story link:
http://www.quarterhorse3.us/bumper_snickers.html

This is me (no April) Fooling

2011-04-01T16:56:00.002-04:00

Well, I see its April Fool's Day. You could have fooled me. When I was a kid, we used to really take this day seriously. On the other hand, it certainly didn't even come anywhere close to Christmas, which is the biggest day in a kid's life.

Now after all these years, it's just another day and one that hopefully no one will play any April Fool jokes on me. I always am on guard the whole day from 12:01AM April 1 until 12:01 AM April 2. You can never be too sure about some people who seem to live for this day.

When Tim and I were kids, we came up with what we always thought was THE quintessential April Fool's day joke. We always wanted to switch the salt with the sugar. Now that is really "down and dirty". The irony of it all was that I cannot recall that we ever actually did it.

Oh well, I shall get back to my vigilance in watching for any jokes on me.

Until later,

Don Trump (APRIL FOOLS)

"Time" for Another Entry

2010-11-06T15:59:00.003-04:00

Is it my imagination, or does the time change date keep getting later? It seemed when I was a kid, the time change to EST was in early October now it's early November. Be that as it may, I'm starting the "fall behind" clock settings early this time. I have already changed the easy ones which includes the vehicles and the bedroom digital clocks. The reason I have to get at least a 10-hour head start is that I have so many of them to change. Here's a list that I can think of at the moment, there may be more added later that I forgot about:

1. The kitchen wall clock

2. The electric range clock

3. The microwave clock

4. The Jeep clock

5. The living room DVD player clock

6. The 2 bedroom clocks

7. The DVD player in the bedroom

8. The living room wall clock

9. Ava's wristwatch

10. The clock on the VCR tape player (Yeah, I still have a few of those relics lying around).

11. The short wave radio clock

Fortunately, the other clocks change the time themselves.

I have not worn a wristwatch in years. I don’t need to because starting in the kitchen where I am happily pounding away at the computer keys, I can see the current time in the following devices:

1. Desktop computer

2. Laptop computer

3. Short wave radio

4. Electric range

5. Microwave

6. Cell phone

7. Brinks Alarm Console

8. Caller ID machine

9. The phone call router (This little gem is a product of modern technology to eliminate junk calls. I'll describe this wonder of American engineering and Chinese construction some other time).

10. Cordless phone

11. Kitchen wall clock

12. Voice mail machine

The living room:

1. Wall clock

2. TV clock

3. DVD player clock

4. Cordless phone clock

5. The wireless weather station clock (This has an atomic clock which is self setting and is accurate to something like .0000000009999 second every million years or so, which I guess is close enough for me. However, during a nuclear attack, it will probably end up a few billionths of a second off).

6. Ava's wristwatch, that I never see her take off. (I think she was born with it on her wrist)

Outside:

1. The vehicle clock

2. The cell phone

The bedroom:

1. Alarm clock

2. The other alarm clock

3. TV clock

4. DVD player clock

5. VCR tape player clock

Let's see, that's 23 clocks so far. I'm SURE there are more, but I will think of them about 2 seconds after I post this Blog entry. I always lament the fact that they never give the time on the radio anymore, but then it dawned on me... Why should they? It would be redundant with so many clocks around us! Well, it's "time" I posted this and get back to setting all the timepieces around here an hour back. I want to beat the rush and not have to get up at 2:00 AM to do it. Later.....

{}MiKe{}

Season "Reruns"

2010-10-30T11:43:00.002-04:00

When I was a kid, I always hated to see reruns on TV every summer. I always figured the TV people were too lazy to make programs all year round. Of course in those innocent childhood days I didn't know about vacations and budgets and the need for actors and crews to take breaks. I know about all those things now from an adult perspective. I just don't have the ambition lately to make any new brilliant Blog entries as a result of my gift of imagination and originality, hence, I shall now offer a Blog "rerun" sort of speak.

Since Halloween is tomorrow, which is very difficult to believe, I offer on old Halloween story from the dusty old story vault on my web site...

http://www.quarterhorse3.us/halloween_capers.html

I trust the next time you, my faithful readers, will be able to peruse a new original and brilliant post to ponder...

*~MiKe~*

Making the "Grade"

2010-10-21T17:29:00.002-04:00

I recently found my grade card from the 1^st grade. It was on the bottom of an old dust covered box. You never know what you're going to find in old dust covered boxes, it is always an adventure. Sometimes I actually find something that solves an old mystery such as the instructions I lost back in the 1970s for the Rubik's Cube I had. I could never figure out how to solve it, but I always had the excuse that I lost the instructions.

If you will note, you will see that there are both regular letter grades, and "S" grades which as the key states mean "Satisfactory Attitudes". I noticed that I got an "S-" in neatness. I didn't even know "Satisfactory Attitude" grades could get a "-". Frankly, I'm very surprised I didn't always get a "U-" for my appearance due to a persistent cowlick I've always had. I've always had an unkempt appearance due to my curly unfettered hair that has never been able to be tamed by man nor beast. The only time my hair ever looked the least bit acceptable was when they shaved it all off in Navy Boot camp. That sure took care of the cowlick! I also have a perpetual ruddy appearance due to a life long heavy dark beard which is the result of an over abundance of testosterone.

Fortunately, Mrs. Hahn showed mercy and I was "Assigned to Grade 2". For 12 years, I always looked with extreme trepidation every time I checked the bottom line, and was always relieved to see that I was assigned to the next higher grade! Frankly, I believe the teachers didn't want to have to spend another whole school year with me, so they shunted me off to the next higher grade teachers. At the teachers' coffee time after school when they talked about all of their incorrigible students, I'm sure they said in a sarcastic tone to the lower grade teacher, "Thanks a lot for sticking us with Mike; you are permanently banned from my Christmas card list!"(The rest of my grade card that has the regular letter grades is on the reverse side. I wasn't sure how the Blog page would react with 2 photos uploaded since I have never attempted it before. In my younger days I would have tried it, but in my older years I don't have the sense of adventure to live in the fast lane any more).

I shall look forward to finding more dust-covered boxes and discovering what other treasures lay therein. Whatever it is, I'm sure it will be interesting and will provide more material for my next Blog entry.

Later... ~MiKe~

Obsessing on Obsessions

2010-08-12T16:57:00.001-04:00

Well, once again I have torn my self away from Facebook long enough to make another rare Blog entry…. I had to go check FB just now to see if I had an answer to my last post. It’s a good thing there is no real-time in posting, or the post would take a long time to read with all the breaks in them with me getting sidetracked so easily.

My latest interest (OK, obsession if you will) is taking photos for Findagrave.com. It is a cool web site that has memorials and pictures of cemetery headstones. There are famous people and just regular people. I have put most of my family and relation on it. It’s home base in Salt Lake City, so I suspect it is sponsored by the Mormons since they are very much experts on genealogy. It is a good source for genealogical studies.

What has been taking a lot of my time and interest lately is that I’m a volunteer photographer for it too. I check the requests that people send in requesting photos of head stones of family members in the cemeteries in my area. I then go out and try and find them and upload photos. I have provided about 47 photos for families. The messages I get from appreciative families really make my day. I have been in dozens of area cemeteries and have seen literally thousands of head stones.

Its fascinating work and none of my subjects ever complain. I can work when I want to and take as long as I want to photograph head stones. It’s just like the government job I retired from so I feel right at home.

If I’m not on Facebook, I am probably out head stone hopping in some area cemetery. Between the 2 of them, updated postings here will no doubt still be few and far between. But I believe in quality more than quantity. Hmmmm, this sounds like as good an excuse as any. Now I must run and check FB and Findagrave.com to check on the latest…….

“The Circle is Now Complete”

2010-06-03T13:30:00.006-04:00

I quoted the line from Darth Vader to celebrate the fulfillment of the dream of all Three Stooges Fans, of which I so proudly hale. After 51 years they finally have all 190 Three Stooges shorts remastered and in chronological order on DVD! They have, of course, had them for years on Video and DVD, and of course I have them all, but never in chronological order and digitally remastered! I just received the final volume this morning. I will watch the last 32 shorts on volume 8 with “mini Three Stooges Marathons” as I often do. This is indeed a major accomplishment and one I hoped would be accomplished in my life time. Don’t expect to see many of us Three Stooges fans for the next few days. We shall be basking in “Three Stooges Paradise”. NYUK NYUK NYUK!!!!!
~MIKE~

An Old Dream Fullfilled

2010-05-24T09:37:00.004-04:00

My goodness, I see that I've been neglecting my Blog as usual! It's hard to believe that Memorial Day is a week from today! As usual, I am looking forward to the Memorial Day parade in my small rural home town. I am a member of our American Legion Color Guard but due to arthritis in the hips and every other major joint, this year I'm going to do only 1/2 of the parade route to the cemetery.

I am definitely NOT growing old gracefully. I remember when I was a kid and watched the Memorial Day parade, I said to myself someday I will be a Legionnaire and march with the veterans. I have been doing that for several years now. I remember the first year I fulfilled that desire and marched with the vets I watched as a kid. It was a feeling of a life long dream fulfilled that I will never forget. In those days my Navy dress blues fit with room to spare. Now they hang in the closet under a thick coating of years of dust build up. In those days when I was a kid, the World War I veterans would always ride to the cemetery, then the World War II veterans started to ride, then the Korean War vets. Now veterans my age are starting to ride to the cemetery. Time sure plays some subtle tricks.

I'm sure some of the kids who will watch us veterans march in the Memorial Day parade next Monday will have the same dreams I did, to someday march with the veterans in the American Legion. They will remember the "old veterans" that had to ride in cars to the cemetery because the march was too long for their arthritic laden joints. I will wave at them out the car window on the way to Memorial Drive this Monday and think back to the time I was on the sidewalk watching and dreaming what seemed to be just a "few" years ago.

One Track Mind

2009-11-11T09:00:00.003-05:00

The older I get, the more difficult it is becoming to do more than one thing at a time. The modern trendy word is "multi tasking". I'm still very involved and focused (actually obsessed would be a better word), with Facebook. Once and a while, such as now, I get inspired to make another Blog entry. This is because for the moment (i.e. "nano" second), I have resisted the urge to click on my "FB" short cut icon and clicked on the "My Blog" icon, hence, ending up here.

I have made a pre New Years Resolution (to avoid the New Year's Day rush), to spend more time on my Blog, thus, no longer depriving the world of my brilliant insights. Hmmm, another case in point of my lack of being able to do more than one thing at a time, since I can not think of any more superlatives at the moment.

I have concluded the best way not to forget something is to make a list and a schedule. Therefore, I will try and adhere to the following 2010 schedule to post things in this Blog on or about the following dates:
Jan. 29
March 2
June 31
October 24

Please bear in mind that this schedule is not inclusive and I may post things more often if I should happen to click on the "My Blog" icon rather than the "FB" icon which would be a result of another failure to "Multi Task" at that moment.

Ohhh, yes, my Blog!

2009-09-20T10:17:00.002-04:00

My goodness! I noticed I haven't made any Blog entries since May! Well, it's the same old reason. I'm still all agog with Facebook. My apologies to my faithful and loyal Blog fans who no doubt have been wondering where I have been the last few months. I've been enjoying the wonderful autumn weather we have been having around here lately. We just finished the last of the hay baling for the season. The vegetable stand is booming and Tim has been doing a lot of business lately.

Well now, let's see.... Do I have any other exciting news to share with the Blog World right now??? Oh yes! I am going to get a haircut this week! Hey, since I am retired, that's a big deal for me to make that "long" trip to Huron!!!!

I shall be resolved to make Blog postings more often when I have additional exciting news. Be watching for an entry later next week when I tell about my grocery shopping trip! Be ready to hear about my life in the "fast lane" if you can handle it!
Later fans...
Mike {:)

“Thumb Driving”

2009-05-15T12:31:00.005-04:00

I purchased something the other day that is both a marvel of Japanese electronic engineering and Chinese construction. It is what is commonly known as a “Thumb drive”. Most of you readers no doubt know what these little gems are for, but if not; they are used to store digital information. It is just a simple matter of plugging this little gadget into a USB port of any computer and downloading files. It can then be used to transfer the files to another computer, or if you wish, store the information.

This little marvel has saved me from having to burn information from my desktop server onto a CD then having to transfer it to my laptop. When I have completed this, I then have a used CD that I either have to throw away or fly like a Frisbee into our fields. The one thing I will miss, however, is flying the CD into the field, but technology and convenience are the order of the day. Alas, advanced technology trumps fun in any form.

The one I have holds 2 gigabytes of information. When I observe how small the thing is, I have to wonder how all that information can possibly fit into it. I wonder if it compresses it like compressed air. If this is the case, then I have fears for my safety. If I should accidently drop it or if the cat should start playing with it and it falls on the floor, will it explode and kill the cat and/or me with 2 billion pieces of digital shrapnel? I can see it now, I’d have to go to the local emergency room and wait while some intern spends days removing all those 2 billion “1’s” and “0’s from all over my body!

I’m surprised that the instructions do not have any warnings about this.
For example:

WARNING!
NEVER attempt to use this product without first taking extreme safety measures to prevent this product from falling on the floor. This could cause an explosion of data that can injure, maim, or kill both people and curious cats. Do not attempt to use this product unless you are wearing a flack vest. Please keep all children and pets at least 829 feet away from the work area.

In the event this product does fall on the floor and doesn’t explode, call your local law enforcement bomb disposal squad immediately and move all people, children, pets, and valuables at least 1,061 feet away from the affected area.

Oh well, I guess this is the price one has to pay for convenience and not being able to have fun with used CDs.

The picture shows me taking precautions before using my thumb drive. For safety, I'm going to use it outside on my new deck.

“All Hands on Deck”

2009-05-12T14:52:00.002-04:00

Ah yes, a blast from the past from my Navy days. After 15 years of talking about it, we are finally building a deck. Its not that we have put it off, it is because at my age, I don’t rush into things like I used to. I only grocery shop once every 6 months because I want to make sure my shopping list is complete before rushing off all half cocked, which is better than half baked which is my natural tendency.

My nephew is constructing it and is only charging me $6.28 cents per hour labor, or $24.61 if I help. In my younger days, I would have built my deck myself. In those days, I didn’t know how to do things like that, but just went ahead and did them anyway. I don’t have the confidence to do things like that now because now not knowing how to do something prevents me from doing it. Old age plays tricks like that on me.

We have plans to throw some home grown 2 inch thick Angus steaks on the gas BBQ grill; plop ourselves down at our patio table with a big umbrella, tune the XM satellite radio to the 60’s channel and turn it up loud (we have no close neighbors), and feast on our own natural beef. I do still have confidence to do that, at least for now. As I get older and realize that I don’t know how to BBQ steaks, I will hire some Yuppie from a new subdivision to come and BBQ our steaks for us. They seem to have a natural talent for BBQing steaks and getting rid of crabgrass. All I’ll need to supply him are the steaks and an apron that says, “Head Chef”.

In the meantime, the sweet aroma of our own natural home grown 2 inch thick Angus steaks will be wafting from my brand new gas BBQ grill sitting on my brand new deck. I will enjoy my steaks in spite of the fact that I don’t know how to BBQ nor will I notice all the crab grass surrounding my new deck… At least for the time being…

M. {;-)

My Latest Facebook Video!

2009-04-28T18:56:00.001-04:00

Due to popular request by some of my loyal fans who are not on Facebook.com yet (shame on you), I am posting my latest video of my Berlin Local School, Berlin Heights, OH Memories series. This and several others of my videos are posted on my Berlin Heights and Berlin Heights Alumni Facebook Groups.

I could withhold these videos from you non Facebook members, but to show you I’m a regular guy, I have posted it for you. (“Ain’t” I a swell guy).

Check it out…

Eureka! It Was Not a Dream!!!

2009-04-17T16:47:00.004-04:00

Being a typical "Baby Boomer", I am always on constant vigilance looking for anything from the "Good Ole Days" or a reasonable facsimile there of. This morning I made a marvelous discovery at, of all places, the small neighborhood supermarket in Huron where I shop!

While scanning the shelves bulging with the typical present day boring cloned tasteless soft drinks that come only in cans, my cynical 6-decade-old eyes came to a screeching halt on GLASS bottles of Grape Nehi! After making sure it was not a dream and recalling that I took my morning lithium dose, I inadvertently yelled out, "Oh my goodness, its grape Nehi!!!" Occasional extemporaneous mild out bursts of this nature are certainly no surprise to the store people since they are used to me. However, one Gen X lady customer looked somewhat bewildered and very warily looked at me with an "I hope he's harmless grin".

The ingredients are the same and it is made with sugar and not the goofy corn syrup that all pop (soda to my Northeast friends, and you KNOW who you are) is made with these days.

My first slow glorious sip of this bottle of "Nectar of the Baby Boomers" was an instant magical flashback to the days when pop (aka soda) was really good! It "ain't" cheap, but I did my patriotic duty to stimulate both the economy and my old brand pop (soda) depraved gullet. For the first time in my life, I am going to be looking forward to going grocery shopping!!!!!

Now if I could just find a pack of Blackjack gum to chew while on those short trips in a 1957 two door Chevy to "Baby Boomer Paradise"! I will certainly make it a point to meet with the store manager next time. I am POSITIVE he will say, "The Blackjack gum is right next to the Grape Nehi".

Rats! Its 4:30 and I missed my noon Lithium dose! Oh well, maybe Blackjack gum would not go very well with Grape Nehi anyway...

Now the Whole World Knows! Yikes!

2009-04-13T16:07:00.007-04:00

I've been having a blast on Facebook and YouTube lately. For you facebook members (and future members), I started some FB Groups: Berlin Heights Residents Past and Present:
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=home#/group.php?gid=68919065476

And Berlin Heights High School Alumni 1950 - 68:
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=home#/group.php?gid=58442669349

I also have Video Stories on my Group and YouTube. For you non Facebook users, here's a sample of one story on YouTube (There are 3 of them so far. Search YouTube under: "Berlin Local School" to see the rest of them.

My Worse Nightmare!

2009-03-29T17:23:00.005-04:00

No, it’s not Rambo. I should be so lucky. It’s my old High School English teacher Miss. Purcell! I had one of my worse nightmares of all time about her last night! As of right now I am definitely going to stop eating my regular midnight snack of whipped cream, catsup, honey, saltwater taffy, rutabagas, fried liver and onions flavored ice cream, and pork chops before I go to bed from now on! (Bear in mind that my nickname in High School was “Crow”.) In my nightmare, she kept saying to me, "How about a little sentence diagramming scare"crow"! EHHHH HEHHH HEHHH!

"We Don't Get Fooled Again"!

2009-03-23T16:01:00.003-04:00

According to the calendar, last Friday was supposed to be the first day of spring. Well today, it was a high of 41! Some spring. They say the best sign of spring is to see red winged blackbirds coming back from the south.

Well, I saw a red wing black bird yesterday. The high temperature yesterday was in the high 30's. Obviously, this red wing blackbird believed the calendar but found it was obviously not spring yet! The last I saw of it was when he threatened a Red Tail Hawk at gunpoint to fly him back south. Oh, you don't believe me huh! Well I'll have you know that I happened to get a picture of it as it flew away heading south! So there!

M {;>)

A Great Day!!!

2009-03-21T14:30:00.002-04:00

I just got the latest volume of the Three Stooges Collection! Forget Facebook, I have something better. Of course, I have all the Stooges on VHS and DVD, but these DVD volumes are in chronological order and digitally enhanced which is something never done before. I am probably one of the most avid fans ever and have the equivalent of a SoD (Doctor of Stoogeology) degree. Just 4 more volumes to go until I have all 197 episodes. I can hardly wait until volume 6 is ready to pre order from Amazon. Well, I am going get off of Facebook for awhile so the Facebook servers can cool down. I am off to warm up the DVD player. Woo Woo Woo...

Mike {;-()

“In Your Dreams”

2009-03-19T09:48:00.003-04:00

Like everyone else, I have certain things I would like to accomplish before I die. It would be interesting to take a poll here and list what things you my readers would like to accomplish before you die.

I, of course, have many things I would like to accomplish before I leave this world for the celestial one. My list would be long indeed. Along this time of year as June approaches, I always start thinking about our Annual Berlin Heights High School Alumni Association Banquet and every year at this time I have my yearly fantasy of doing a certain daring act. As a matter of fact, I’ve been planning to do it for over 40 years on the night before our Alumni Banquet and hopefully start a new national trend. This would fulfill the fantasy of not having had the courage to do it while I was in High School. Since I’m not getting any younger, I really hope I can finally gin up the courage to really do it this June. I sure hope the ladder is handicap accessible…

What I Did on My Facebook Vacation

2009-03-12T15:03:00.002-04:00

Hmmm, I see that I have not been on my illustrious Blog lately. I must confess it is because lately I have been all "ga ga" about Facebook and the fascinating world of social networking, or in some cases social engineering. I am trying to balance my time between Facebook and my Blog. So far, it has been way out of balance in Facebook's favor. However, I intent to correct the imbalance with a counter weight. That way I can spend more time on Facebook and not feel guilty about not posting here as much. This may prove to be a bane for my Blog readers, or a relief, depending on how you look at it ;-) Rest assured, beloved readers, that I will eventually maintain a better balance and redirect my obsessions back here. Well, I must get back to Facebook to see if I have anymore "Friend Requests".
Later...

Prescription Drug Warning!!!

2009-03-07T10:53:00.002-05:00

Like most everyone these days, I have been taking fish oil capsules. The main reason is to lower my high cholesterol as a result of a lifetime of over indulgence of fried stuff. A few months ago my physician prescribed what I call “industrial strength super fish oil capsules”. They are very expensive because the fish oil is ultra concentrated much more than the type one can purchase “over the counter”. However, after taking these “industrial strength” fish oil caps, I have discovered good and bad benefits. The good benefit is that my cholesterol is rapidly lowering. The bad news is that all of that super concentrated fish oil is having a very frightening side effect. The picture below proves my point! It wouldn’t be so bad except for the fact that I can only sleep at night in the bathtub filled with cold water!

“Over Exposed”?

2009-03-07T10:05:00.004-05:00

It just occurred to me as I just signed off on Facebook, that I am becoming omnipresent and ubiquitous on the Internet. Let me summarize. I have a web site, a Blog, a Yahoo Group, I’m on Facebook, planning to be on My Space, planning to start a podcast, and on some other web sites I have designed and maintain, and probably several other places on the Internet.

Below is a recent picture of me. Yep, I’m definitely over exposed these days!

“Spaced Out”

2009-03-03T10:42:00.005-05:00

I figured it was about time to offer something useful again in this Blog. For those of us who enjoy watching satellites and space junk orbiting the sky, I found a cool site to do just that. It lists times and locations to see cool stuff from any location in the world.

It may take a little time to learn how to navigate the web site since it is a typical poorly designed site so prevalent these days. Of course, any site not designed by me is hard to navigate {;-)

Now I can’t wait for a warm night to go looking. The way this winter is going, it might be some time before I can spend a few minutes outside at night without getting frostbitten eyes.

Happy hunting! http://www.heavens-above.com/

Mike

Free Parking

2009-03-02T15:30:00.002-05:00

Among the hundreds of things I used to see as a kid but do not see now, but wished I still did, are people that park their pencils behind their ears. When I was a kid, all clerks, etc. always had a pencil behind their ear. I believe the main cause of the demise of this practice these days is because most information is now recorded on a word processer or spread sheet program on a lap top computer. No one seems to write things down with a pencil or pen on a pad of paper any more.

What mystifies me is in keeping with the times, why people these days don’t park their wireless mouse behind their ear. It works for me…

But then again, I have always been on the cutting edge of new trends!

Pardon My “Backfire”

2009-02-28T16:08:00.003-05:00

I heard something last night that I haven’t heard in years. About 10 PM I heard a big noise something like a firearm going off. That’s not unusual for us since we often fire our rifles, shotguns, and pistols from the porch at night at pesky woodchucks or skunks. I peered out the door and suddenly heard another explosion. This time it had a deep bass sound like a big mortar firing. The next morning I ask Tim about it and he saw that it was a truck backfiring as it slowed to turn down the intersection east of our place.

This is very unusual in this day and age because all engines are run by a computer and I haven’t heard any backfiring in several years. It must have been a very old truck I assume.

When we were kids, long before engine computers, we used to love backfires. There were two ways to produce backfires. One was by removing the “vacuum” advance hose on our car engines. As a result, several neat backfires would ensue while slowing down for a turn. The other way was the best, but often resulted in dire consequences. This was performed while traveling at highway speeds, then turning off the ignition key for a few seconds, then turning it back on. The result would be a gigantic backfire that sounded like a cannon going off! Unfortunately now and then it would blow our mufflers apart. Oh well, a small price to pay for a cool backfire. When our mufflers exploded as a result, we would just go the Norwalk Bargain Center and buy a new Cherry Bomb muffler for 5 dollars.

My one regret is that I turned off my ignition while going very fast one time and blew up both of my beloved dual glass pack mufflers. Most agreed that my dual glass pack mufflers on my 1955 Ford had the coolest sound around in 1966. Cherry Bomb mufflers never sounded the same after that. Oh well, the backfire was one of my all time best since it was in stereo and all our friends who heard it were impressed and said I was “cool”. I guess it was worth 10 dollars to be cool for a few minutes.

The pics below are of my 1955 Ford that I had in 1966. Note the cool duals with the glass pack mufflers before I blew them up!!!! :-(

My Other Halve(s)

2009-02-28T11:23:00.001-05:00

I recently I did a Facebook search of my own name and found that there are 4 others on Facebook with the same name as mine!!!! All these years I thought I was the only one in the world with my name. Now I wonder if I am schizophrenic. Aha! That would explain why my psychiatrist always charges me only half his hourly rates for each of my sessions.

Now if I could only find one more guy with my name I could play basketball by myself and have a whole team! I guess schizophrenia has its advantages indeed!

Well at least now we know.

More later…
Mike, Mike, Mike, and Mike ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-)

One Wish

2009-02-24T16:21:00.001-05:00

We all have fantasies of what we would wish for if some genie appeared out of some lamp and granted us one wish. In my case hopefully there would be no small print that prohibits from asking for more wishes. On the other hand, I’m sure any genie that is legitimate would have this contingency covered.

If I were to get unlimited wishes, among them would be to have the whole 43 episodes of the Road Runner and Wile E. Coyote cartoon series on DVD. In my lowly opinion, these are the funniest cartoons ever made. I have been enjoying watching them on YouTube which as far as I’m concerned is a very constructive way to wile away these cold snowy days of winter. However, it would sure be a lot more convenient to watch them on a TV screen rather than my laptop screen.

Now that I think about it and ponder relative to this “any wish thing”, I have doubts as to whether I would use my one wish wisely. I can picture the scenario now. Let us say that I was climbing a mountain in Tibet and as I reached the very peak above the clouds, I spied an old Guru who held all of the wisdom of the ages. As I approached him and stood in awe, he would grant only me the answer to one and only one question such as the key to world peace or the cure for any disease. I can see it now, as I stood before him in awe, I would be thinking of the one question that would benefit all mankind. Knowing myself, I would probably ask him, “Do you wear boxers or briefs?”

Alas, for the benefit of the world and all mankind, one can only hope that I would not be the very first person to stumble across that guy!

And now beloved readers, I shall go back to YouTube and watch another Road Runner and Wile E. Coyote cartoon. By the way, does anyone know what the “E.” means in Wile E. Coyote’s middle name? Aha! Now if I were to meet that Guru, I will certainly have a legitimate question to ask! Certainly, the whole world would like to know what his middle name is!
!!!Mike!!!

“Facing” The Facts

2009-02-15T17:09:00.002-05:00

Well, as if I don’t have enough obsessions already, my twin brother got me into Facebook.com! That’s all I need are more obsessions. I’ll just have to add this latest obsession to the long list of my other obsessions including: Jeeps, horses, cats, reading, writing, boots, my web site, this Blog, pod casting, and a whole gaggle of other obsessions only my psychiatrist knows about and some even he has never heard of.

I must admit that I am really having fun in the fascinating world of on line social networking. You can check it out at www.facebook.com and look me up. I need all the Facebook friends I can get just like in real life. (I just hope I will have more success on finding Facebook friends than I do in real life.)

On second thought, it would probably be easier if you just emailed me and I will send you an invitation to join Facebook.com and then take you into my care as a Facebook friend, which involves a little less “red tape”.
Use this email to contact me with your request:
zukeyjuice-mikesblog@yahoo.com

In order to avoid overloading the Yahoo email servers with thousands of emails to me to be my Facebook friend, please use the following schedule:

For middle names beginning with A – G send your emails between 1:42 – 1:59 AM. For middle names beginning with H – L send emails between 2:06 – 2:11 AM. For middle names beginning with M – Q send emails between 2:12 – 2:19 AM. For middle names beginning with R – Z send emails between 2:21 – 3:05 AM. If you have no middle name, then send me your email requests between 3:38 – 4:01 AM.

I’ll be looking for you!

Your (future) friend?...
::M::

I Finally Found It!

2009-02-09T12:16:00.002-05:00

No, not my sanity. Dream on fans. For quite a while, I have been trying to find free software to download YouTube videos. I finally stumbled onto something that does it on line with no software to download.

If you would like to download any YouTube video on your hard drive to save and watch anytime on your favorite media player, check out
www.zamzar.com It not only downloads on line videos from YouTube, but others as well. You can also convert any files including the weird ones such as ogg, aac, ac3, and some others I have never heard of. It converts stuff into mp3, wav, wmv, etc. It also converts all kinds of other files and does other cool stuff! Check it out! The best feature is that it is free and that is good enough for me.

(And you were thinking I never have anything useful on my Blog!)
***Mike***

Some "Juicy" Bit of News!

2009-02-04T13:00:00.005-05:00

Now and then, I go to different stores for one reason or another. In doing so, I sometimes find items that are not stocked by the stores I normally patronize. While browsing around Drug Mart this morning I found Donald Duck brand fruit juice in a big tin can. I have not seen this since I was a kid and I assumed that they stopped making it years ago. It took me back to that time. I immediately purchased a can of it. When I am finished drinking the juice, I intent to clean out the can and keep it when I wax nostalgic, which is very often indeed.

In the world of the same old present day brands, it sure is refreshing to see a brand from my child hood for a change!

Now if I could find Bonomo Turkish Taffy, that would really make my day!

I have been having fun surfing YouTube and finding old TV commercials from my youth. To this day, I sometimes get the following song in my head and it stays there all day! It more than likely will stay in your head all day too! Remember, obsession loves company ;-) Check it out! (Note: if you do not have high speed Internet access, you will have to click on the pause button until the video loads.)

“Monopolizing” My Thoughts

2009-02-03T13:11:00.001-05:00

I have never been, am not now, nor will ever be a “winter person”. As a result; I have been spending an inordinate amount of time inside during this cold and snowy weather.

Since I rarely watch TV, preferring to read instead, in between books, I have been spending more time on my laptop and exploring many things on the Internet. During my course of surfing, I have been checking out all the things that Yahoo offers. One section I have been camping out in has been Yahoo Games which, needless to say, has all kinds of games. One particular game that caught my attention was Monopoly. I down loaded it and played one game. After finishing it and losing, I came to the conclusion that playing electronic Monopoly is not nearly as much fun as playing on a real board with real dice, etc. This would explain why I’ve always preferred empirical items rather than electronic ones.

The computer version of Monopoly has absolutely no equal to the fun we used to have playing as kids on a real board. In the computer version one can not physically perform things such as rolling the dice and have them fall off the table. Neither can I “stash money” to later overwhelm my opponents when they think I could not afford to put hotels on Park Place and Boardwalk Ave. When I played as a kid, I would often volunteer to be the banker so I could attempt to embezzle funds. When I wasn’t the banker, I would attempt to rob the bank when my funds were low. Unfortunately I had no way to embezzle funds or rob the electronic bank.

I would invite my readers to check out the following link to one of my old stories about playing Monopoly as a kid, which will render much more detail about playing Monopoly on a real board:

http://www.quarterhorse3.us/monopolizing_our_time.html

“Opening” Remarks

2009-01-29T17:41:00.003-05:00

I’ve noticed these days that more and more cans now have pull tab openers. First it was beverage cans that started off with pull tabs, thus making metal beverage can openers obsolete. Now it’s getting more and more evident that soon can openers will be an endangered species. In spite of the fact that the older I get, the more I resist change, this is one change that I laud. One big reason is tuna fish cans. I’ll sure be glad when they finally come with pull off tops. It has always been an irritant to me that every time I open a can of tuna, the can opener smells like tuna for weeks. Just in case you’re wondering, I always wash the opener in hot sudsy water, but it never seems to do any good until the tuna aroma finally fades away on its own. It’s like cutting onions or being sprayed by a skunk, it just takes time for the smell to pass in spite of repeated washings. The one big difference between waiting for onion smell on my hands to naturally pass is that unlike a skunk smell, I don’t lose friends. One the other hand, one consolation for skunk smell is that I can always find a back seat in church.

Since it is inevitable that in the future can openers will be obsolete, I intend to save some for posterity. In several years they are sure to be very valuable especially to a can opener collector or to someone who has old cans socked away that still need an opener.

As I get older, I get wiser. I remember when I was a kid, my grandmother was always telling me, “The things of today are the antiques of tomorrow”. I sure wished now that I would have listened to her. If I had, today I would either be very wealthy or have the biggest collection of junk in Berlin Township. Therefore, in light of that, I am starting to save things here and there that I’m sure will be “the antiques of tomorrow”. Years ago I saved a Rubik’s Cube in the box unopened because I was sure that one in that pristine state would be very valuable someday. Unfortunately, I misplaced it years ago! Oh well, whoever finds it will make a lot of money no doubt.

In order to prevent loss, I’m planning to put a few brand new can openers in their original unopened packages in my safety deposit box at the bank. I have no doubt they will be valuable someday, at least in China. I’m very pleased that I am finally getting far sighted and practical in my old age, although in the opinion of many people that’s still debatable. If I’m mistaken, at least I’ll become an expert poker player in the distant future. I’ll be able to show my “openers”. I’ll bet the other players won’t be able to do that!

~<Mike>~

Safe Bicycling

2009-01-29T12:29:00.002-05:00

I’m making great progress on my winter exercise program on my recumbent stationary bicycle. I’m now “riding” 201 feet, 4 ½ inches, which is 0.038 miles, which sounds much further and thus much more encouraging than feet. By April 1st, I’m planning and working hard to be up to 212 feet, 2 1/8 inches which is 0.040 miles which is a nice round number and a worthy but difficult goal for me. I am confident I can reach this goal by hard work each day.

While doing research on the Internet about riding bicycles, they highly recommend wearing a bicycle helmet for riding safety. Since I do not own a bicycle helmet, I figured my motorcycle helmet would suffice. Now I can have confidence that I can ride my stationary recumbent bike in my living room in ultimate safety.

Mike ;-)

No Switch Switch

2009-01-29T11:21:00.003-05:00

Remember in the good old days when everything had an on/off switch. However, I have noticed in the last several years that most powered things these days do not have an on/off switch. I’m sure it is obvious that this is a cost saving device used by manufacturers.

As a result of this cost cutting (i.e. cheapness), it causes a great deal of aggravation to the consumer, it least it does to THIS consumer. For example, I recently obtained a snazzy digital cooking timer which of course has no on/off switch. The directions state: "In order to save batteries when not in use, remove one of the batteries". This little marvel of Chinese engineering has 4 batteries. Removing the rear battery compartment door and removing and installing one of the batteries before and after each use is a real pain in the neck, not to mention the fingers! Part of the major conspiracy by non on/off switch manufacturers is not only putting batteries in and out before and after every use, but have you ever tried to remove battery covers. No easy task if you have very short finger nails like I do. This cooking timer has 5 different timers including one for each burner and an oven timer! This also creates a mystery as to why there are 5 separate timers and 4 batteries.

Of course we all have several things without on/off switches these days and I’m sure I am voicing universal aggravation. It wouldn’t surprise me to find that someday everything will lack an on/off switch. As far as I’m concerned that would a real emotional “turn off”. (After removing a battery of course).

M-I-K-E

For Guys Only!

2009-01-23T15:37:00.005-05:00

If I had to surrender all of my DVDs and had the option to keep only 1 series, it would unequivocally be The Three Stooges. I have been watching them on either TV or DVD for 50 years. During this entire time, I have never tired of watching them. For the most part, all their fans have been dominated by guys. It's a "guy thing". Being such a devoted fan, I have thoroughly scrutinized every book written about them. I have an extensive Three Stooges database I have created through the years. Recently I have added some fascinating figures to my database. This is esoteric information I've always desired to know and now finally have. The following figures will be germane to us ardent fans. The following data encompasses all 190 episodes the Stooges made.

Total Face Slaps: 2,695
Total Eye Pokes: 222
Total Head "Conks": 187
Total Pies Thrown: 224
Most Slaps in one Episode: 69 (Fright Night)
Most Eye Pokes in one Episode: 11 (Woman Haters) (This figure is the most pertinent to me because this is my favorite Stooge antic)

The previous statistics are just a few of the comprehensive ones I have gathered over the course of many years.

All right guys, I know you have always wondered and now you know! Moreover, most (if not all) people say my Blog never contains anything useful! That shows what you know! Unlimited praise and adorations will be gladly accepted via any of my many email addresses.

Epilogue:
I imagine most of you lady readers are now no doubt thinking, "This stuff is atrocious"! I must point out that I had a disclaimer at the onset and I must reiterate. It's "A Guy Thing". If you ladies are really serious about trying to understanding all this, you will have to get a testosterone plus an anabolic steroid injection. BOING! Upon pondering this concluding point, at my age, I think I will get in line for one of those injections too! Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk ;-)

Mike

Electronic Apron Strings

2009-01-23T13:07:00.003-05:00

In my last post, I mentioned schools having web sites these days. In keeping with this electronic theme, I shall now examine the subject of cell phones. I am really into all sorts of electronic gizmos these days and wished we had had them back "in my day".

However, the one exception to this desire is cell phones. Cell phones are not bad in themselves, but I was amazed to learn recently that most every kid has one. When I was a kid, the last thing I needed or desired was to have a means of communication from home. The main reason for this is due to the things I did and the places I went. For example, if I had had a cell phone at school, I would have been caught doing all kinds of "shady" things that I normally got away with.

I can imagine my mother calling me at school on my cell phone:

RING RING....... This is your mother calling. You haven't lost your lunch money have you!

Me... Absolutely not! (I would never have admitted that I lost it that morning playing marbles at recess and losing a 25 cent bet that I could roll one of my marbles and hit my opponent's marble 175 feet away).

Mom... You wore your coat outside for recess like I told you to, didn't you? You know it's -6 and the wind chill is -45

Me... Sure mom, I'm not stupid you know. (In order to impress my guy friends that I was a real man, I never wore my coat outside at recess).

Mom... Now do like I told you this morning and come straight home from school because Aunt Horetense is going to be here.

Me... I would really like to, but I asked my teacher if we both could stay after school for some private tutoring in spelling, which you know is my worse subject. (Actually, I had detention for not wearing my coat outside for recess).

Mom... Well, OK. You're such a little angel!

Me... I sure am Mom. Well the bell just rang and I wouldn't want to be late for class. Bye Bye mommy dearest. (I sure couldn't tell her I have to go and hide in the restroom during spelling which was my worse subject).

Now that I think about it, I'm sure thankful that cell phones were not invented way back "in my day".
M I K E

High Tech Homework Avoidance

2009-01-23T11:32:00.003-05:00

Earlier today, I was doing some "spring cleaning" of all of my superfluous bookmark links. I'm sure we all have these in our web browsers. While checking all the links to see whether they were still operational, I checked out several websites I haven't been to in a long time.

One bookmarked web site I went to was our local high school. They have a great web site and I enjoyed browsing through it. It's amazing how high tech is influencing our daily lives. I pondered the pros and cons if we had had a school web site in my day. The best pro I would have enjoyed would have been sending anonymous crank emails to our high school principal and teachers. I can think of one example email I would have loved to have sent to my high school English teacher:

From: John Q. Student
To: sophie@berlinhtsschool.ed
Subject: You

Hey Sophie! I think you are too cruel to all of us students in your 4th period English class and that you are a cranky old bag. Just to really bug you, I'm going to use improper English on purpose. Heey, yu,.. eye thnk of u whenever Ie usse wrog speling or gramer. I realy lik to use dangling partysipels to. U aint never ganna know who this iss. I'm even going to give you my name and you will NEVER EVER be able to figure out who I am because I'm going to misspell it on purpose. YOU OLD BAG. HA HA!
Mikke Tillinghaste

On the con side, I noticed a section that listed homework assignments from each teacher. This would have really caused me much trouble. Since I rarely did homework, this would have nailed me for sure, because I could no longer use the lame excuse that I didn't know what the assignment was. On the other hand, since I was a genius in coming up with award winning lame excuses, I could still have circumvented the on line homework assignments. I would have said that I tried to download the homework assignment, but since I only have dial up Internet access, the assignment had not completed downloading at the time I had to leave for school.

Now that I think about it, it was probably just as well we didn't have the Internet in those days. Hence, I can honesty say that things were indeed better in the "Good Ole Days" at least as far as homework assignments go.
mike {;0)>

“TOEING” THE LINE

2009-01-21T13:03:00.003-05:00

It has been said that truth is stranger than fiction. I have certainly observed the truth of this platitude over the years.

For example, we all are familiar with the comic strip cat "Garfield". Since I like cats so much, I always make it a point to read it every day. One of our house cats is an orange tiger and looks a lot like "Garfield". His name is “Punky”, aka “Little Orange” ska (sometimes known as) "THAT DARN CAT!!!”

All cartoon characters have certain characteristics that are exaggerated. With "Garfield", it’s sleeping upside down on his back with his feet sticking up and his rear toes bent. At any rate, I have always thought that was just a cartoon thing. However, I was very surprised when I saw “Punky” sleeping the same way as Garfield i.e. upside down with feet in the air and rear toes bent. This time I snapped a photo and posted it below. Truth is indeed stranger than fiction!

Cats Don’t Grow on Trees

2009-01-17T17:42:00.003-05:00

I just returned from the barn after feeding the horses and cats. As a rule, a certain number of barn cats always run away, get sick, or get run over in the road, etc., which thins out the population by natural means. However, this immutable modus operandi has not been the case for the last several months. I’ve had 17 barn cats since last spring and I still have 17. It’s apparent that all the cats are happy and content and have no need nor desire to seek happiness and contentment else where. I have always liked cats, but 17 of them are a bit too many even for me.

Most people wonder why I don’t practice unnatural population control and instead of cat food, give them a diet of “lead”. Oddly enough, I have no difficulty shooting varmints such as raccoons, woodchucks, skunks (only at a great distance using my military issue high powered rifle with a powerful scope), rats, mice, or even lions and tigers and bears (Oh My!). For some reason I have never been able to shoot cats, nor do I have any future plans to do so.

One reason among many I choose to keep all of them is because every time I go into the barn, all 17 cats start to meow and gather around my feet which makes any further walking very difficult, indeed. The one very valuable benefit I have gained from this is that I can now gracefully and lightly waft through and around any objects blocking my path. Just as “grasshopper” in Kung Fu learned to walk on the thin rice paper without tearing it, I have now mastered the fine art of walking through cats without squashing any of them. Among many practical applications of this rare talent is that if any bully placed several hundred eggs ahead of me in an attempt to block my path, I could walk through them without breaking any of them thus instilling both fear and awe in the mind of the bully and as a result gaining his respect and admiration. At this juncture, I must humbly state that not just anyone has the ability to do the aforementioned amazing feats. This gift is only attained by years of diligent and patient practice of wading through a solid mass of meowing cats.

I believe God has a reason for everything and He has given me this extraordinary gift of walking softly through a gaggle of cats, which contributes a very valuable service to the well being of all mankind. Cats and eggs don’t grow on trees you know!

<)Mike(>

NOW HEAR THIS!

2009-01-17T15:41:00.003-05:00

Like most people my age, I am convinced I am getting a little hard of hearing. As a matter of fact, I'm even having trouble hearing what I'm typing. I'm going to have to type a little louder. THERE, THAT'S BETTER. NOW I CAN HEAR IT MUCH BETTER.

I RECENTLY HAD A HEARING TEST AND THEY SAID IT WAS NORMAL. I JUST DON'T BELIEVE THAT. I'M SURE THE TECHNICIAN DID NOT HAVE THE TEST EQUIPMENT CALIBRATED CORRECTLY. YEEOW! NOW I AM HAVING TROUBLE HEARING MY KEYBOARD AGAIN. AH! THAT'S BETTER.

Since I'm convinced that the hearing center did not properly adjust their hearing equipment, I'm going to request a hearing hearing and have them look into it. I should be hearing soon about the hearing hearing and if I hear anything, I will pass it along right "here", so you should be hearing something soon. This kind of mistake is unheard of, at least I've never heard of anything like this. If any of you have ever heard of this kind of thing happening, please let me hear about it. I'll be listening.
If you email me about hearing anything, please type your message in all caps, since I am getting a little hard of hearing. At least that's what I've heard lately...

mike (I think I just typed my name, but I couldn't hear the keys. If not, it's me)

"squid" pro quo

2009-01-16T18:56:00.003-05:00

A few years ago, I got tired of microwave cuisine, so I have been doing home cooking ever since. In my case however, it could be called "homely" cooking. In fact, I now consider myself a gourmet cook. Although anyone who ends up eating my cooking would debate that title.
Lately I have desired to venture into more exotic cuisines rather than the usual dishes I whip up like home boiled hot dogs and so forth.

While I was in Norwalk the other day, I happened to drive down the "seedy" part of town and I spied an old rusty van sporting a sign that said, "Fresh Sea Food". Since the license plates were from another state, I figured that all the seafood was imported. I parked and walked up to a guy who was sitting on the rear tailgate. He was all scruffy with long greasy hair and I assumed that he was a professional fisherman. My rationale was that a typical fisherman would certainly look disheveled from days at sea. There was a sign that read "Fresh Squid". Since I hadn't had squid since I was in the Navy, I eagerly jumped at the opportunity to have it again after so many years. In spite of it being very expensive at $19.99 per pound, I nevertheless decided to splurge and get 5 pounds of it. Since he didn't accept credit cards or personal checks, it was a cash only sale. Fortunately I had enough cash to purchase my find. I excitedly rushed home in time to prepare it for supper. It was delicious and tasted a little like hot dogs, only much much better.

I went back today to get 5 more pounds but the van was gone. He probably went out fishing for more of that delicious squid!

We all enjoyed my very first gourmet meal!!! I was so proud of my accomplishment that I took a picture of my squid meal to share with all of my faithful readers in Blog Dom.

Check out my creation!...

Global Warming Where Art Thou?

2009-01-16T16:45:00.001-05:00

I sure wish man made global warming were a fact. It's been so cold here since last night, I would pretend to believe it at least for one day, hoping "mind over matter" would make it feel warm for a change. Of course man made global warming is a myth perpetrated by the government to gain more control over the populace (that's us average folks). Even though this would be a most appropriate time to refute the greatest deception of the century, I shall digress to what is germane at the present time and effectively and categorically refute this foolishness in a future Blog posting.

It hasn't been above zero here all day and last night it was minus 13. As I was bundled up and waddling out to the barn this morning, my brother yelled something to me, probably commenting on how cold it is. Unfortunately, I heard no words at all since I'm quite certain they froze in the air. I'll have to wait until spring for the words to thaw out so I can find out what he was trying to say to me.

You know its cold when I filled the horses' water buckets with ice-cold water from the frost proof faucet and there was steam wafting from the surface of the buckets. When I finally arrived back in the house, my hands were so cold that I had to put them into the freezer to warm them up. Yeowwww! Now that is cold indeed. Not to be outdone, on the way back from the barn I saw a polar bear asking directions how to get to Miami. It could have been my imagination, but it sure seemed real to my cold numbed brain.

All right, in all seriousness, just to put all of you at ease who are convinced I have finally "gone over the edge" and that I am seeing delusions, I must admit that I didn't really see a polar bear asking directions to Miami. (It was a penguin).
Later...

~~MiKe~~

WHAT’S IN A NAME?

2009-01-15T10:35:00.002-05:00

I have recently been pondering the subject of first names and how they have changed over the years. When I checked the Internet for popular boy’s and girl’s names in 2008, I found all kinds of cool names. I really like the names that parents give kids these days. I also did a check of popular boy’s and girl’s names in 1948, which is my era. I found the following top 10 names:

2008
Boys:
Aiden
Ethan (My favorite name of all) (My grandson’s name)
Noah
Caleb
Braydon
Jacob
Landon (The name I picked out in 1980 for our deceased son)
Liam
Lucas

Girls:
Ava (Great name, indeed)
Isabella
Madeline
Abigail
Olivia
Lilly
Sophia
Chloe
Ella

1948
Boys:
James
Robert
John
William
David
Michael (The best name of all)
Richard
Thomas
Charles
Ronald

Girls:
Linda
Mary
Barbara
Patricia
Susan
Sandra
Nancy
Carol
Sharon
Kathleen

All in all, I think kids' names today are much better than they used to be. I always wished my name was a bit different (to match my personality). Some of the first names for me I would rather have had are the following: “Best”, “Greatest” “Wonderful”, “Cool”, “Genius”, etc.
So what’s in a name anyhow?

Mike (alias: “Best”, “Greatest” “Wonderful”, “Cool”, “Genius”, etc.) ;-)>

A "CEO" BARRIER?

2009-01-14T21:06:00.002-05:00

These days it is extremely difficult if not impossible to find any electronics made in the USA. There are some reasons for this; however, this is not my scope for this treatise. Perhaps I will get into that subject on a later post.

My emphasis this time is to point out something that has always puzzled me. On the one hand is my befuddlement as to why manufacturers don't make the instructions for their products clearer and more easily understood. Be that as it may, on the other hand, why are there so many spelling and grammatical errors in the vague instructions?

I shall point out a case in point. I received a small portable heart monitor today to use with my recumbent stationary exercise bike. Like most electronic gadgets these days, there are all kinds of electronic readings with this thing. After pondering the vague instructions, I did what I always do with useless instructions these days; I figured it out for myself since some of the features were not even mentioned in the so-called "instructions". If that weren't bad enough, the instructions were infested with incomplete sentences and several misspellings. Since this little electronic marvel was made in some "sweat shop" in Taiwan, I could understand the problems if the instructions were composed by some Taiwanese guy since some foreign language terms do not always translate well into English. I've noticed this is especially true for Asian languages. Now the aforementioned is bad enough, but even the outside of the box had a blatant misspelling of the word "weight". Check it out in the photo. I have underlined the blatantly misspelled word "weinght" (i.e. "weight") with a red line. Although this product is made in Taiwan, it is manufactured for an American company in Minneapolis! I would think that the CEO's would have at least sent a copy of the instructions to the Taiwanese "sweat shop" with proper English to print.

Alas, another mystery that could be so easily rectified...

A HEAT WAVE!

2009-01-14T14:17:00.007-05:00

Since it is near 12 degrees outside, this presents yet another auspicious occasion for me to whip up another batch of my famous "4 Alarm Hotsy Totsy Chili", which is guaranteed to warm both the inside and outside of anyone who has the courage to eat a bowl. (Or even a teaspoon.)

Now that it is simmering away on the range, I shall take this opportunity to make a quick entry in my Blog. For more details about my famous chili, I invite you to peruse an earlier story I posted on my web site germane to this subject.
http://www.quarterhorse3.us/a_chili_reception.html

:::MIKE:::

Exercising and Not Getting Anywhere

2009-01-07T19:54:00.002-05:00

My physician recently informed me that my cholesterol was too high and that I’m at risk for heart problems. I’m not too concerned because my psychiatrist has been telling me for years that I am at risk for brain problems. Nevertheless, I’m still as mentally sound as I have ever been. (Rebuttals will be accepted for the next 2 minutes). I have recently started to take “industrial strength” prescription fish oil in addition to several “over the counter” herbs like flaxseed oil and a bunch of other stuff that promises not only to dramatically lower my cholesterol, but will also cure my arthritis and will make my body and prostate gland immortal.

My physician also said I need to exercise during the winter months. As a result, I recently purchased a stationary bike. It’s a recumbent which means I can practically lay down when I am using it which sounds good to me. I used to ride my “non stationary” “non recumbent” bike all over the place, but I eventually found it was too dangerous due to all the traffic on the highways these days. Now I can pedal away in the safety of my own living room with the only danger being the possibility that one of the cats or my foot getting caught in the revolving spokes.

My new recumbent stationary exercise bike also has the latest electronic “bells and whistles”. It tells me how many miles I’ve “ridden”, the time “ridden”, miles per hour, and heart rate (which is something I’d rather not know). It even has a cup holder (What thing doesn’t these days). This will come in handy to park my lard and butter milkshakes while I’m “riding”.

I’m intending to use it daily. I’m hoping by this summer I will have bulging muscles and the heart and arteries of a 5 year old (to match my brain) so I can finally look forward to going to the beach and not have some muscle bound guy kick sand in my face. Up till now, I have been the world’s foremost authority on the study of the effects of swallowing sand.

See you at the beach this summer. (I’ll be the guy with the sand covered face).

===Mike===

Cartoon Physics

2009-01-07T11:31:00.005-05:00

In the last posting I looked at Hollywood 1950s westerns physics. I will now ponder cartoon physics. This is where the laws of physics really take a back flip.

I shall illustrate cartoon physics with my all time favorite cartoons, The Coyote and the Road Runner. In my opinion these are the funniest cartoons ever made. If I were stranded on a desert island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean and asked what one DVD I could take with me, it would be the Road Runner. However, with my fading gray matter, I would likely forget to take a DVD player and probably a TV as well! In addition, even if I did remember all these accoutrements, I would have no source of electricity to operate them. My only hope would be to try and recall every episode of Gilligan’s Island since the professor would surely have had an electric power generating plant made from palm tree logs and drift wood. Oh well, be that as it may, now to the subject at hand.

The Coyote and the Road Runner cartoons comprise all of the cartoon physics. For example:

One - When the coyote paints a picture of a tunnel through a mountain, the road runner passes right through it. When the coyote tries to go through the painted tunnel, KAZAM!

Two - All cartoon characters have the ability to defy gravity and walk in mid air, until they realize it and then suddenly the law of gravity kicks in and they immediately fall to earth. The universal exception to this law is the “good guys” who are being pursued by the “bad guys”. The falls of great distances never result in any injuries.

Three – All characters have to ability to get hit by boulders, trains, trucks, automobiles, etc. and only see stars thus avoiding any injuries. The only consequence of being hit by a giant boulder or safe is an accordion effect on the body which passes when the next scene starts.

Four – All characters have the ability of being injury free when being shot by guns, cannons, explosions, etc. The only visible consequence is a black sooty face.

Five – My all time favorite cartoon physics is when anyone’s nose gets pinched, it always honks like an old time car horn.

Well, I’ve only given this subject a perfunctory treatment. There are many more instances of cartoon physics. The main thing about these is that they are funny, very funny indeed, and that’s the bottom line.

It is very unfortunate that one rarely if ever sees any good old fashioned Looney Tunes broadcast any more. Fortunately, I have recently acquired 6 volumes of Looney Tunes DVDs with some Road Runner cartoons! I’m now going to watch a few as soon as I post this which will be immediately since after contemplating this thesis, I am approaching cartoon “paradise”!
(((MIKE)))

Hollywood Westerns Physics

2008-12-30T11:03:00.002-05:00

I recently purchased a DVD set with 150 old 1950s television westerns for $10.00. Great stuff! Included are a few episodes of Annie Oakley, The Cisco Kid, Lone Ranger, etc. Just the thing for a nostalgic Baby Boomer like me.

While watching some of the same episodes I watched as a kid, I noticed several things that never occurred to me from my "kid prospective" when I first watched them in the 1950s. I have entitled my observation, "The Physics of 1950s TV Westerns".

1. When bullets hit any object, they always ricochet. This includes trees, rocks, wood, bare earth, anything, and everything.

2. When an outlaw is being pursued and they run out of bullets, they always throw the empty six-shooter at the "good guy" who is running after them. However, I have never seen them hit by the tossed six-shooter since they always duck at the last second.

3. When anyone gets into a fistfight, the "smack" sound is always the same and after repeated punches, no one's jaw is ever broken.

4. During a gun battle, usually among big rocks, they can fire their six shooters for hours without having to stop and reload.

5. Whenever anyone is stranded in the desert and runs out of water they always yell, "Its empty!", and angrily throw their empty canteen on the ground and keep walking. I've always wondered what they would do if they later found a water hole. They would have no way to store water for the remainder of the trek through the desert.

6. When the "bad guys" are finally apprehended and locked up in jail, there are never any bathrooms in them. I always assumed they "crossed their legs" until the trial or the lynching by the local town people, whichever came first.

Oh, well, now that I'm older and watch this kind of cool stuff, I mainly enjoy the nostalgia of watching some of the things from my childhood. I'm too busy being entertained to continually dwell on such things. On the other hand, I have to wonder...

On my next Blog entry, I will examine the topic of "Cartoon Physics".

Riding off in the sun set...

mike

A True Christmas Classic!

2008-12-19T14:38:00.004-05:00

Like most people, I always watch all of the classic Christmas movies this time of year. I have always enjoyed watching A Christmas Carol, It’s a Wonderful Life, Scrooge, etc. However, my all time favorite Christmas movie is always overlooked. It is indeed a classic and I have never understood why it is very difficult, to find on VHS or DVD. Fortunately, I have a DVD copy. The title is Santa Claus Conquers the Martians. One of the all time classics, indeed. If you don’t have a copy of this masterpiece, you can still get one before Christmas. The best place to find it is either in bargain bins at lesser known discount stores in smaller deep jungle villages in Africa, or the place I found it, at the landfill.

It’s sad that so many people in this society just don’t know what a good Christmas movie is. I guess I’m one of the very few that have highly refined tastes relative to this subject.

Hmmm, I wonder if it is illegal to watch DVD Christmas movies in the summer. If I ever do indeed plan to watch these movies in the summer, I would definitely watch them very late at night with curtains drawn and doors locked so as to avoid any night time raids by the off season Christmas movie police. Now that I think about it, whenever I watch my DVD Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, I always watch it late at night with curtains drawn and doors locked. And that is only during the Christmas season when it's legal!

mike

Confession of a “Fugitive”

2008-12-16T16:56:00.006-05:00

I stopped at a fast food joint this afternoon and the cashier rang up my purchase with the senior discount! I saved 60 cents. I was surprised that she just assumed I was qualified since I didn’t “flash” my new Golden Buckeye Card or ask for the senior discount. I guess I just look like a “senior citizen”. I was nervous about accepting the discount. The reason was that I am not officially a “senior citizen” yet because my 60th birthday is on the 22nd of this month!

YIKES! I sure hope the “Taco Bell Gestapo” does not find out and start an investigation and find that I won’t officially be a senior citizen until Monday of next week. I’d sure hate to get arrested and put in a maximum security cell block with those who tear off mattress tags or spit on the sidewalk. I guess I’ll just have to live in fear and keep looking over my shoulder until Monday. If you want to call or visit me, please wait until at least next Tuesday because I will not be answering my phone or door since I am going to keep a “low profile” until then when in the eyes of the the State of Ohio and Taco Bell, I will be an official “senior citizen”, which is a polite politically correct way of formerly calling people “old codgers”.

Pssst, if you stop at the Taco Bell in Norwalk before next Monday, please don’t mention my name or my description because they will certainly recall that distinguished tall handsome guy with the cool Jeep Wrangler who was there on this date and was given the senior discount.

Thanks, I knew I could count on you…

Your soon to be a “senior citizen”… (Name withheld until 12:01 AM December 22nd).

Safe Surfing Freebie

2008-12-10T14:22:00.004-05:00

Hey beloved and loyal Blog readers, its time once again to post something actually useful for a change.

As we all know, the Internet is a very dangerous place these days. Among the hundreds of email newsletters I regularly receive, many are on the subject of Internet dangers including malware, viruses, etc. There are thousands of very malicious and insidious things out there in the cyber world, my friends.

Among the many things I use to help make my surfing safe, one of the best safety guards is SiteAdvisor by McAfee. It works great and is totally free. It checks each site you open for phishing, malware, spam distribution, and other aggravating things one is in danger of while surfing.

If the site you are visiting is safe, then the SiteAdvisor bar is green. If it is a dangerous site, the bar turns red. Any site not yet tested the bar turns yellow. One of the best things is that the program is integrated with the major search engines such as Yahoo and Google.

Below is an actual pic of my Explorer page with the program in operation indicated by the red arrow in the upper left hand corner.

Check out the SiteAdvisor site for details and free down load. It sure can't hurt and it's free!
http://www.siteadvisor.com/

((((MIKE))))

Another Installment to my Ongoing "Cereal"

2008-12-09T14:52:00.002-05:00

I was at the supermarket this morning and got some fixins' for Crockpot "Hobo Stew". I thought this stew was fitting because I'm once again "bummed out" because as usual I looked in vain for my favorite breakfast food, Puffed Wheat and Rice. I haven't seen it on the shelves for ages. I believe this is yet one more conspiracy against us baby boomers by the younger generation who just do not know what good stuff is. One of my theories is that since Puffed Wheat and Rice is "shot from guns", the younger generation is trying to ban all guns, which greatly aggravates my NRA genes.

These same people perpetrated yet another major conspiracy. They dropped lime Life Savers and substituted watermelon or some such obnoxious flavor. They have done this with several of the old time cherry, lemon, and orange flavors of most formerly good stuff.

Alas, what is this world coming to...?

mike

It’s Official!

2008-12-02T18:37:00.003-05:00

I just received my Golden Buckeye Card in the mail today. I’m now officially a “Senior Citizen”, at least as far as the State of Ohio is concerned. I don’t feel like a Senior Citizen, and heaven knows I sure don’t act like one! From now on I expect all of you to treat me with the respect due to the older generation. At the very top of the list is to always let me be right and never contradict me because it’s disrespectful to your elders.

Hurray, now I have free reign to state my opinions and no one will dare disagree with me. YIKES!!! In light of what I just said, it sounds like I also have something else that comes with being a Senior Citizen; the onset of Alzheimer’s!!!!!

((((Mike))))

Christmas Traditions

2008-11-30T14:17:00.006-05:00

Now that the Christmas holiday season is upon us, I thought I would spread some Christmas cheer. We all think back to our Christmas experiences we had as kids. I think it would be fun to share my family's Christmas traditions and memories when I was a kid.

When I was a kid back in the 1950s (YIKES! That was a long time ago now that I think about it), Christmas was THE day that my twin brother and younger sister and I were in the state of sheer bliss! It was a Nirvana-like state. On Christmas Eve, our parents would go to Norwalk to my maternal grandparent's house. Their tradition was to open all their presents on Christmas Eve. We kids always wished that we could open all of our stuff on Christmas Eve, but alas, it never came to pass.

Meanwhile, at home my fraternal grandmother "Ollie" had an old Irish family tradition of having oyster stew and apple pie on Christmas Eve. She insisted that we kids at least take a "taste" of the wretched concoction. I held my nose and took a microscopic few molecules of it. The taste almost ruined Christmas for me. However, I persevered every year. Ironically enough, I am the only one of our generation that has kept up the tradition all these years, albeit I'm the only one that consumes any Christmas Eve oyster stew. Through the years, I have actually acquired a (small) taste for oyster stew.

Our parents would wait until we kids were in bed before they left for Norwalk to engage in a night of unbridled revelry, which consisted of imbibing quite liberally with spiked eggnog and other "spirits" late into the night.

On Christmas morning way before dawn, we kids would be up. Our tradition was that it had to be dark when we opened presents. It took forever to rouse our parents from their bed to come down and join us since they insisted we wait for them. In later years I finally figured out the reason why it was so hard to get them up before dawn, namely, they both had terrific hangovers!

Later in the afternoon, we had a gigantic meal, usually ham with all the "fixin's'".

Oh, hey, an idea just popped into my head. How about you my loyal Blog readers sending me your childhood Christmas traditions and memories for me to post here on my Blog to share with all of us! I do not need to know who you are; just use your first name or an alias. You can email them to me at
zukeyjuice-mikesblog@yahoo.com
Be sure to put "Christmas Blog Entry" in the "Subject" line because I get a horde of emails about my Blog and we wouldn't want to miss your experiences here. Just think of the EXCITEMENT and PRESTIGE for you my former passive readers actually contributing to my renowned Blog!!!!

The picture below is of us kids on Christmas Eve in 1956 when I was 8. Our stockings are hanging up behind us, Tim and I still hang these same stockings every Christmas Eve. However, at our age Santa has started filling them with things like Geritol, Metamucil, etc. Note the cat I am holding. I have a life-long love of any animal, especially cats. I remember posing for this picture as if it was yesterday.

Be watching my Web Site for some new Christmas stories coming up!!!

M

i

k

e

A Change of "Pace"

2008-11-30T13:24:00.003-05:00

YIKES! I just noticed that the last few of my Blog entries have actually been practical and useful. I sure wouldn't want word to get out that I am serious and rational. Therefore, I shall immediately get "back in my groove" of being abstract, off the wall, pedantic, esoteric, arcane, compulsive, and a bunch of other superlatives too numerous to mention here.

Since my satellite radio is always on the 60's channel, I am bombarded with ubiquitous 60's music. As a Baby Boomer, I can imagine if all of the 60's songs were re released today, they would have to change the titles. Just a small sample of the new likely new titles would be the following:

Paul Simon - "Fifty Ways to Lose Your Liver"
Carly Simon - "You're So Varicose Vein"
The Bee Gees - "How Can You Mend a Broken Hip"
Roberta Flack- "The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face"
Johnny Nash- "I Can't See Clearly Now"
The Temptations - "Papa Got a Kidney Stone"
Nancy Sinatra - "These Boots Give Me Arthritis"
ABBA - "Denture Queen"
Leo Sayer - "You Make Me Feel Like Napping"
Commodores - "Once, Twice, Three Trips to the Bathroom"
Procol Harem - "A Whiter Shade of Hair"
The Beatles- "I Get By with a Little Help From Depends"
Steely Dan - "Rikki Don't Lose Your Car Keys"
Herman's Hermits - "Mrs. Brown You've Got a Lovely Walker"
The Rolling Stones - "You Can't Always Pee When You Want"
Credence Clearwater Revival - "Bad Prune Rising"
Marvin Gaye- "I Heard It Through the Grape Nuts"
The Who - "Talkin' 'Bout My Medication"
The Troggs - "Bald Thing"
The Rolling Stones - "119th Nervous Breakdown"
The Beach Boys - "She's Real Fine My Formula 9"
The Beatles - "Day Dripper"
The Beatles - "Penny Lame"
The Surfaris – "Wiped Out"
Bob Dylan – "Knockin' on Bathroom's Door"
The Beatles – "I Don't Feel Fine"
Herb Alpert – "A Taste of Geritol"
Gerry and the Pacemakers – One of our fastest growing popular groups from the past.

Epilog... "Big John" by Jimmie Dean is presently emanating on the 60's channel on my satellite radio. Do any of you 60's music aficionadas
know what song was on the "B" side. (It was, "I won't Go Huntin' With You Jake"). This paradox never ceases to amaze me; I can vividly remember something like this from 47 years ago, but I can't remember anything from 47 seconds ago. RATS, I have to run to the bathroom right now...
"Keep on Rockin' in the "Pee" World"...
+=Mike=+

Wishin' Ya a Happy Thanksgiving

2008-11-26T16:47:00.002-05:00

On this Thanksgiving eve, I have the turkey breast thawing and looking forward to preparing a good old fashion Thanksgiving meal tomorrow. Not that the rest of the world cares, or that I care what they think, but I have always been aggravated by the trend in the last few years of referring to Thanksgiving as "Turkey Day". It is a day set aside to show thanks to our Creator, not just a day to have a turkey meal. Be that as it may, I will lay aside espousing my personal beliefs and aspirations (for now). In honor of Thanksgiving, I am posting a link to one of my old stories from my massive story archives, which is germane to Thanksgiving. I hope you will enjoy it.
www.quarterhorse3.us/thanksgiving_turkey_tales.html
Counting my countless blessings...
~<>~<>~<>~
Mike
~<>~<>~<>~

More Paradoxical Conclusions

2008-11-25T10:15:00.003-05:00

In my previous Blog entry, I pondered the thesis of foods that cats desire and why they do. In this Blog entry, I will state another paradox germane to the insect kingdom.

One of my least favorite subjects has always been biology. I did not enjoy it in high school or college. However, I did have one high point in college biology class when the professor allowed us to do some independent research on the topic of our choice.

Since there was a gaggle of grasshoppers in the biology lab, I pondered experimenting to determine the auditory ability of grasshoppers. Since all kids are referred to as being "cute as a bug's ear", I was determined to test by the scientific method the thesis to determine if bugs have ears. I donned my lab coat and retrieved a grasshopper from the grasshopper hopper. I placed the grasshopper on the lab counter, clapped my hands, and yelled, "JUMP". The grasshopper jumped right off the counter. At this stage in my experiment, I observed that grasshoppers could indeed hear. I then removed its right rear leg and repeated the experiment by clapping my hands and yelling "JUMP". It still jumped off the counter. I progressed to the point where I removed the other three legs, clapped my hands, and yelled, "JUMP". This time the grasshopper remained perfectly still. I repeated the process several times by clapping my hands and yelling "JUMP". Subsequent to this experimentation, I formulated the obvious conclusion that grasshoppers in deed have ears and can hear. However, if all of their legs are removed, it causes deafness. I sent the results of my experiment to the scholarly periodical "Bug Times". Oddly enough, that was over 38 years ago and I have yet to hear from them. I'm now convinced it was just another example of professional jealousy since I was the one who first discovered this. I have since given up on any further insect experimentation after I discovered that in the field of entomology it is a "Bug eat bug" world.

Addendum: I did have dealings with grasshoppers earlier in life. These dealings can be found in the dusty archives of my old web site stories. Check this out: www.quarterhorse3.us/grasshopper.html

(()) MIKE (()) ;-o

Another Paradox

2008-11-24T13:00:00.003-05:00

I have just returned from the market with a whole bunch of canned cat food. I usually buy fish flavored cat food for the house cats because they like it better than the other flavors. At least they eat about 90% of each serving, which is a much better average than with any other flavor. It is my contention that they like the fish cat food the best because the Creator designed them to catch fish. In addition, they are also divinely created to catch mice. I've often wondered why no one makes mouse flavored cat food, which would be very desirable to cats along with fish cat food. One possible reason is that it would "gross out" some cat owners. Another reason may be that no one knows what a mouse taste like. It is highly unlikely that anyone can find human volunteers to eat a raw mouse to ascertain the taste. Then there's the problem of trying to isolate that taste and finding a chemically based artificial taste.

Since my cats don't seem to like beef or liver flavored cat food, I have surmised that the reason for this is that they are not designed to capture and eat cattle or to find any liver lying around.

Now, I shall state the paradox. Since cats are designed to catch and consume fish and mice, consequently, they have an affinity for the taste of fish and mice. Conversely, fish would seemingly not have an affinity for worms because worms are not indigenous to living under water. Yet, they eagerly go after a worm baited hook. The only conclusion I can conclude is that fish do not have taste buds.

In conclusion, my regular readers can readily tell what season it is without referring to a calendar because since it is winter, I have way too much time on my hands. Well - Someone has to ask questions and ponder things like this.
^^*MiKe*^^

How to "Reproduce" Without the Birds and the Bees.

2008-11-19T17:48:00.003-05:00

Now that I have everyone's attention, I will now reveal something I mentioned in my previous Blog entry. Namely, how to capture any screen image and post it, keep it, print it, use it as desktop wallpaper, or anything else your fertile imagination my take you.

If you desire to capture a screen shot, hit "shift" and "Prt Scr". Then open Paint and click "Edit" "Paste". Presto! The screen shot will appear in bmp. If you have image editing software, you can convert it to jpg, gif, or whatever. You can also paste it into Word. Cool, eh. You can use the "save as" .jpg, gif, etc. in Paint, but the image will be much better if you convert it with your preferred image editing software. This is especially applicable if you desire to convert it to the gif format because I've pragmatically discovered that Paint doesn't "play well" with gif conversions.

As to the derivation of the "Prt Scr" (Print Screen) key, I believe it is a recessive trait from DOS. My rationale is based on the fact that it never works with Windows because it never prints the screen. (Even with the printer on).

Well, there you have it, yet another esoteric tip from the vast wasteland of my Lithium-laden gray matter. Oh Oh! I just remembered that I have Bill Gates on hold on my cell phone. He has a question concerning how to print something... (Lithuim-laden, indeed).
Later...

{:~/

"Highlighting" My Point

2008-11-19T14:25:00.007-05:00

As I surf my way around the Internet, I'm always amazed at how many poorly designed web sites I come across. Of course, if everyone would have a web site design as well as mine there wouldn't be any problems. :-)

The biggest frustration I encounter is dark lettering on a dark background, which makes the text very difficult to read. Another aggravation is words or links that have such small letters that they are very difficult to see. I have found the solution to these problems, other than letting me design all of the web sites in the world.

When you see these problems, just highlight the text with your mouse and all of the text will show up in white with a dark background, thus making things much clearer. This is a good antidote for the epidemic lack of common sense some web designers show these days.

Note the illustration of an actual poorly designed web site before and after highlighting with the mouse. (For the purpose of not embarrassing the designer, I have blotted out some information). (IT'S NOT MY SITE)

I'll bet some of you are wondering how I reproduced a pic of an actual web page. Do not miss my next thrilling Blog entry where I will show how to capture a screen shot of any web page, or any screen shot for that matter, with out having to use some expensive software application. We Windows users already have the software in Windows that Bill Gates never told you about. However, I will. Mike :~)

Another "Baby Boomer" Alert

2008-11-16T17:52:00.003-05:00

Hey Fellow Baby Boomers. Check out this "Blast From The Past"! I'll bet this stirs up some memories!!! Beer makes you smarter, it made "Bud wiser". (We all remember that lame pun don't we????)

MiKe {:-o

A "Snow" Job!!!

2008-11-15T16:56:00.003-05:00

EGAD! Just as I am about to make the long trek to the barn to feed the horses and the cats, I noticed it just started to snow! The forecast is for 1 to 2 inches for tonight! I've always dreaded the first snowfall of the year because that is the start of snow for the next few months. The first snow for me is akin to the onset of a toothache that will be abscessed for the next 5 months. To say I loath winter would be the biggest understatement since General Custer said, "Don't worry men; I'm sure these are friendly Indians".

If I didn't have so many roots around here, I would have moved to Florida years ago. (All right Jim, NO gloating)! :-)

Oh well, the best I can do is to persevere until spring as I have done for the last 59 years. I must share my misery, so I am posting a picture of the start of the snowfall that I took about 30 minutes ago.

Later...

M M M M M M M Mike ((((S S S S S Sorry about that gang, I get so so so nervous when I see snow that I start to st st st st stutter)))))

Even More Things Bill Gates Never Told You

2008-11-12T17:34:00.006-05:00

Most, if not all of us, use MS Word and just love the "Spell Checker" feature. I use it quite often. Now don't get the idea I'm bad at spelling. The problem is that I get to typing so fast that it shorts out the typing key signals and results in many misspelled words even though I hit the correct keys. (If you believe that, I have some prime swampland building lots in Louisiana I can sell you). Don't you wish you had a spell checker like MS Word for Blog entries, chat sessions, news group postings, and anything else you type on a web form? Well, fans, you can have one! Go check out: www.iespell.com/. I've used this for quite a while and it works great! It even looks like MS Word "spell check". (I suspect Bill Gates is "moonlighting" because he needs the extra money to buy a Mac lap top with MS Office 2008). This little free applet sure beats going to night school and taking remedial spelling or typing or using a dictionary while I type.

You will never again be embarrassed by misspelled words on web page forms, which is akin to "the heartbreak of psoriasis". From now on, people will think you are very intelligent. It works for me (if they only knew...)
mike

"Grounds" for a Conspiracy?

2008-11-12T12:47:00.003-05:00

I read several on line news sites each day and noticed that school grounds are now referred to as the school "campus". When I was a kid, school grounds were called school grounds or school property and never a "campus". I'm not sure when they became the school "campus". When I was in college and graduate school, the grounds were and are referred to the campus. I thought only colleges were authorized to use campus.

Even hospital areas are now called the hospital "campus". Here again, when I was a kid the hospital area was collectively called "the hospital".

Oh, hey, wait! I just looked up "campus" in the New American Dictionary (on line, of course), and I now quote the definition, "The grounds of a school, college, university, or hospital". Well, there you have it. I stand corrected, or do I? Hmmm, I wonder how an older dictionary defined "campus". I will have to check and see if there has been some kind of conspiracy that changed the definition of "campus" to include school and hospital grounds. I seem to find conspiracies in most things these days. Now and then, I am indeed proved to be correct. I shall continue my investigation and post the definitive results. Meanwhile, I will continue to refer to every school and hospital area as "grounds" until I am shown to be incorrect. (OK, maybe this time of year I will admit I have too much time on my hands)(However, this gives me more time to exhaustively study and expose conspiracies).

MiKe {;-]

Memorandum Entry

2008-11-11T15:23:00.002-05:00

I just remembered it was Veteran's Day. I realized this when I walked the 300 feet to my mailbox and discovered there was no mail. In honor of this day, I just cannot resist reaching way back into the dusty archives of my web site stories to one of my many military experiences. Check out this true story I posted several years ago:
www.quarterhorse3.us/sharpasaneedle.html
Anchors Aweigh...
M~I~K~E

Relatively Speaking

2008-11-11T14:49:00.003-05:00

My High School principal recently passed away. His name was Roy Garland aka "Bobo". He was 78 when he died. In doing some quick math, he was 36 in 1966 when I was a senior at age 17; he looked"old" to me then. Now, if I see someone who is 36, they look very young as a result of my present "flirting with 60" perspective. This is the result of what I call KPS i.e. "Kid's Perspective Syndrome". This syndrome shows why people who were young then looked very "old" to us when we were kids. This also explains why things that looked very large to us as kids now look small to us as adults. It is all about perspective. To illustrate, think back when you lived at home and then returned home after being away for a long time at college, the military, etc. The house now looks much smaller to you, which, of course is due to KPS.

Because of my KPS theory, I have done observations over the years and have been amazed. Every year I take a fall tour through our local cemetery where most of my family and old family friends are interred. I usually take a pocket calculator with me and note when people I knew as a kid were born. I then figure the year when I was a kid and subtract the year they were born. It always amazes me that most of them were in their 20's or early 30's then. They all looked very old and gray to me then. This, of course is in accordance with my KPS theory.

There are, however, some rare exceptions to my KPS theory. The biggest one by far is my old High School English teacher, Miss Purcell. When I was in High School in 1963 to 1966, she looked very old then. When I saw her 30 years later at one of our alumni banquets, she still looked the same. Apparently, she was locked in some sort of time warp, or maybe I am. After all, without exception everyone who knows me always says I haven't changed one bit from High School and that I have never acted my age. Not then and not now. As a result, after much testing, I have coined yet another syndrome. MBWS (Mike's Brain Warp Syndrome).

=+Mike+= {;-]

"Drive By" Entry

2008-11-10T16:39:00.002-05:00

Hey gang, just a quick post. I finally got around to posting a new story on my web site. Those of you who have not stumbled onto my famous web site or true stories yet, this will give you a chance to check it out (if you dare). Oh, here's the new story link: www.quarterhorse3.us/stretching_the_facts.html
Gotta run, have to feed the horses and cats...
^^^MiKe^^^

"HORNING" IN ON MY DAY

2008-11-05T11:42:00.001-05:00

This morning as I was walking through the Drug Mart parking lot, I heard a few staccato horns "beeps". I always look to see if someone who knows me is trying to get my attention so they can wave at me. When I hear the "beep", I always look around but never recognize anyone. I then realize that the "beep" is just the sound that assures some one that when they close their vehicle door and leave it that this signals that the auto alarm is armed. I have never had an auto alarm so I'm not used to the horn sound. Nevertheless, I always look involuntarily. I guess I'm afraid that someday it will indeed be someone trying to get my attention so they can wave at me. If I don't look, they will think I'm "stuck up" and take offense. After leaving a large parking lot, when I get home, I usually have a stiff neck from all the looking in response to the dozens of "beeps" but never seeing anyone I recognize.

Well, I will keep looking around just in case because you just never know who it might be...

The "Daze" of My Dreams!

2008-11-03T17:22:00.002-05:00

Well, the time changed back to EST yesterday. I never liked the time change back to EST because, in the past, I would end up feeding the horses in the dark both morning and evening before going to the office and after getting home. Now that I'm retired, I can always feed the horses in daylight both morning and evening. In fact, I just got back from the barn at 5:02 PM before it started getting dark. This is so much better since I don't have to trip over all of the barn cats in the dim lights in the stable. Which reminded me of one of my original sayings, among many. This one has to do with my retirement that I shall recite now...

Ah, Retirement!
When every day is a Saturday,
And every night is a Friday night,
And every day is a holiday,
And every holiday is just another day!

I'd venture to say that no one has ever looked more forward to or now enjoys retirement as much as I do! In fact, I created an Excel program that automatically counted down the years, weeks, days, minutes, down to the very second until my retirement. I started this countdown 4 years before I retired and proudly announced the days I had left to go every morning I came into the office for 4 years! On the day of my retirement a few years ago, I loudly counted down to zero and immediately walked out of the office for the last time. Working for the county for 28.251 years never made me rich, but the benefits were well worth waiting for, indeed! I don't know the exact time right down to the second that I have been retired, it only mattered before I retired...
::Mike:: {;-)

A "Sign" of the Past

2008-10-31T09:23:00.005-04:00

On my famous web site, I wrote a story some time ago about a sign that was posted in our village about horses and riders keeping off the grass and sidewalk. This sign was posted when I was a kid and was necessary because so many of us had horses and we often came into town with our horses. This became a real nuisance to the town people. Apparently, the village council put up this sign to discourage us riders to keep out of town, or at least not ride on sidewalks and lawns. I must say that we just ignored these signs as we did other signs when we were kids. No one really caused any trouble about this since we have a rural village. I was raised with horses here on our family farm. In fact, I presently have 4 horses. I just can't imagine life without horses, dogs, and cats underfoot. I don't ride much anymore due to arthritis, but I used to ride in town from time to time just for old times sake. I got away with it because all the signs were taken down years ago. I guess everyone in town admitted to defeat. Besides, who doesn't like horses?

My brother was helping to tear down an old barn on our neighbor's farm the other day, and Lo and Behold, he found one of the old horse and rider signs!!! WOW, talk about making my day! No one knows how one of the old signs got in the barn, but the main thing is that I now have one. I'm going to put it up on my horse barn. What a "blast from the past".

Check out the sign find>>> ^>Mike<^

Soap or Treat

2008-10-30T10:55:00.005-04:00

Well, I see that tomorrow is Halloween already. My how time does fly! When I was a kid, I loved treat or treating. I still love the concept of trick or treating, although I haven't gone in years. Since I'm "flirting" with 60, I guess I could be arrested for impersonating a kid. Although all that know me know that I still act like a kid (on rare occasions that is).

I used to love to get all the candy to somewhat sate my sweet tooth, which I still have. Sometimes I would get an apple instead of candy and was disappointed, but all the rest of the candy offset that.

Although kids still go trick or treating these days, I have noticed over the years that Halloween has become a holiday more for adults than kids because there are so many parties that adults have these days. Another thing I haven't seen in years is kids soaping windows. I guess this lost art has gone the way so many others have that we did as kids. We used to love to soap windows from people who didn't give us any candy, hence the term trick or treat. If we really didn't like the person, instead of soap, we would use paraffin, which was much more difficult to remove from windows. If we REALLY had a grudge, we would soap the screens. This resulted in the trick that kept on giving because it was very difficult, if not impossible to clean a soap-streaked screen. Months later, the results of our vendetta were still evident. Alas, Halloween has never been the same since I was a kid.

For a more detailed description of our Halloween capers, you can read one of my famous stories on my world famous award winning web site. Check it out:
www.quarterhorse3.us/halloween_capers.html
Happy Halloween...
M I K E

Things We Can't Live Without (today)

2008-10-28T19:01:00.001-04:00

I recently went to a horse show and was going to be gone for the weekend. Since my Internet access is through microwave, I called my provider to report I would be shutting down my transmitter. If I don't do this, they call within a few minutes after it shuts down. I guess they want to find out if there is a technical problem. They really keep a close monitoring. Before I called them, I noticed that the Internet access was very slow. When I called customer service to mention I'd be shutting down the equipment, it took several calls to finally get through. Apparently, a whole lot of irate callers were inquiring what the problem was with the sudden slow service. When I called only to mention that I was shutting down the transmitting equipment for the weekend, the technician was ecstatic! I'm sure he was fielding several calls from other users regarding the inadequate Internet service. When he realized I wasn't calling about the service, he said if I were here, he would kiss me! I'm glad I wasn't there because people would talk. This problem happens now and then and if one waits a little while, the problem clears up. I guess all the other users haven't realized that yet.

It dawned on me how much we depend on the Internet these days. It also occurred to me that once upon a time the Internet was a luxury, now it is a necessity. It's odd how things that were once a luxury have become necessities. I remember when I was a kid that a riding lawnmower was a luxury owned only by people that had the money to purchase one. These days it seems everyone has a riding mower even when their lawns are the size of a postage stamp. Here again is yet another example of a luxury becoming a necessity. By the way, it takes me an hour to mow my big lawn with a push mower since I still don't have the "necessity" of a riding mower.

Of course, I could list dozens and dozens of things that were formerly luxuries that have now become necessities. I guess we all can by looking at our present day lives that are filled with "necessities".

Oh, I have to go now, my microwave just rang, and it is time to eat... ;-))
==Mike== {;-)

GPS Conspiracy? :-0

2008-10-28T10:52:00.002-04:00

Those of us that have GPS devices figure we can never get lost and have faith in our GPS device to accurately get us where we are going. Or do they? Unfortunately, this is not always the case. Check this out: http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_3063945.html
Mike {:-]

Another Sure Way to Stop Spam

2008-10-23T15:21:00.004-04:00

I have received quite a few emails from people all over the country thanking me for the computer tips and other entertaining stuff I have been posting. I had no idea that so many people read my Blog! Hey, don't you people have anything better to do???? ;-)

I have another guaranteed method to stop spam. I have been working on the hardware to do this. After much experimentation, I have finally perfected my sure fire spam filter. If you use this for all of your email, no spam will ever get through. I guarantee it! In fact, it is impossible for it to get through. Check out the photo below to see the details of my exclusive spam preventing hardware. The hardware is still in the beta stage at present. I'm testing different handle colors to see which one fits into modern decor. You can contact me to order my Sure Fire Spam Stopper. Just send me a check for $3,999.99. Please make sure your check is certified (like me) ;-o

::Mike:: {;-]

Mike's Sure Fire Spam Filter

Where's the Taffy?

2008-10-23T14:11:00.004-04:00

I just received my copy of The Good Old Days magazine and they had a recipe for homemade taffy. This put a question into my mind; Whatever happened to Bonomo Turkish Taffy? All of we baby boomers will remember this delectable delight. I never knew why they called it "Turkish" taffy. Maybe taffy was invented in Turkey.

I remember when I was a kid how good it was. It kept dentists busy because it tended to pull out your fillings. Be that as it may, it tasted GOOD! It came in 4 flavors, chocolate (my favorite), vanilla, banana (my least favorite), and strawberry (my second least favorite). The first thing you did was to slap it on a hard surface to break it up into jagged pieces. Sometimes I would put it unopened on our fuel oil stove to soften it up. Now and then, I would leave it on top of the stove too long, and it became a big glob. I sure didn't want it that soft. It costs 5 cents and it seemed to be a huge bar. Of course, when you’re a kid everything seemed bigger because of what I call, "a kid's prospective". If I could find it now, from an "adult prospective" it probably would be the size of a "fun size" candy bar. I did some on line research and found that it was discontinued in the early 1980's due to, "changing tastes". I wished they had consulted with me first, because my taste for that stuff has never changed.

Alas, yet another "Gen X" conspiracy against baby boomers :-(

Blog Bonus! Hey fellow baby boomers (and non boomers), check out the swell video from YouTube. This will bring back some memories!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7d7Fou0LhKY

==Mike== {;-)

A "Breath of Fresh Air"

2008-10-19T08:59:00.002-04:00

Greetings fellow Blog readers. This will be quick and short since I'm just about to leave for church. My day is starting out just great. I just received an email from one of my old classmates and it made my day. Although both of us are on the opposite ends of politics, we have been having intelligent exchanges of political opinions and ideas. This is exactly how it should be when we discuss politics. Thank you Jim, you "made my day"! Now as to some you other people I attempt to discuss politics with, take a lesson in the proper way to do that... ;-) I'm glad that I am full of "warm fuzzies" this morning because we had a hard frost last night and it was 28 degrees when I woke up at 5:30 this morning. I don't do cold well at all, but at least my insides are warm this morning. Hey Jim, lets continue this conversation in January when its below zero :-))
Later...
Mike

"Disposing" of a Problem

2008-10-18T11:18:00.019-04:00

Now, beloved readers, as promised, I will describe a guaranteed elimination of spam. We live in a disposable society, so why not be able to dispose of spam. As all of you know, spam is a real problem. The latest studies show that about 80% of email is spam and it is getting higher. As most of you know, spammers can get your email address when you post it on chat groups, news groups, Blogs (such as this one), when you order things on line, sign up for on line news letters, if you have a web site, etc. If you have a web site as I do, I get much more spam than people who don't have a web site. I did an experiment a while ago, and put one of my disposable email addresses on my web site. Less than 2 weeks later, I started getting spam with that address. Spammers use "spiders" and "botnets" to harvest email addresses from the Internet.

Now to the solution to all of this. If you use Yahoo Mail, you may already know about this solution, if not, read on. Yahoo Mail has a cool thing called, "Disposable Addresses". I don't know if other web email services have this since I only use Yahoo. In Yahoo Mail, go to your account and choose "Options" in the upper right hand corner. You will then see a list of email options. Choose "AddressGuard", and then follow the instructions. What this does is to create a "disposable" email address that is tied into your account and you will get email from your disposable address at your regular account "in" box. Set up a permanent primary email address, and then fill in the rest of it. What I do is when I sign up for an on line newsletter, etc, I put the web site name for the secondary email address.Let me illustrate, if I sign up for a newsletter, I will put the name of it in the disposable address. Let's take a fictional web site, if I sign up for the newsletter "Cockroach Chronicles" that is offered on a web site called, RaisingCockroachesForFunAndProfit.com, I will put "cockroachchronicals" as part of my disposable email address. Then, if I should get spam with that address, I know from whence it came. To prevent any more spam, I just delete the address. If I desire to continue receiving the "Cockroach Chronicles" on line email newsletter, I just make up another disposable email address and update it on their web site. I have hundreds of "disposable" email addresses so far. Yahoo lets you make up to 500 disposable address, which should be sufficient for any of us. Although, I must admit that I am getting close to the limit due to all the news letters I get and membership in news groups, discussion groups, etc. They do add up, indeed.

Check out my example for this Blog. If you look on the bottom of the left column, you will see my disposable address for this Blog:
zukeyjuice-mikesblog@yahoo.com. Note that "zukeyjuice" is the permanent primary address, and "mikesblog" is the disposable secondary address. Maybe your Internet email service provides this service, if not then use Yahoo Mail. Give it a try and you will eliminate all of your spam problems, at least from where you used a disposable email, and you will know where the spam came from. Neat, don't 'cha think!

Oh, by the way. There is no way that anyone can get your permanent personal email address or your profile from your "disposable" address. This comes in handy for example when you are "flamed" by someone on a news group or if someone question's your parent's marital status before you were born, etc. You can then just delete the disposable address you used and not risk getting any nasty emails from anyone in the group.

If you desire, you can even opt to send email from your disposable address. I use this option while trying to have an intelligent discussion and debate with liberals on democrat Blogs and groups. Since liberals are totally incapable of intelligent debate, it is very easy to nail them on their incorrect, illogical and irrational argument's. Rather than intelligent answers (they never have any) to my arguments, I always get their inevitable angry personal attacks. When that happens, I can dispose of my email address to avoid being harassed by the "Brainless Liberal Lemmings" as I call them. Others refer to them as "Useful Idiots". The reason they can not have an honest debate about their beliefs is that their whole system is based on emotion and prior brainwashing instead of an intelligent, logical, empirical, epistemological, rational, and pragmatic base like conservatism is.

Yikes! I'm getting off on another one of my famous "side tracks"! I'll save this subject and thesis for future posts when I will explain the origin, methods, proliferation, methods of indoctrination, and dangers of liberalism and how by purposeful design and intent it will destroy our free enterprise system and our God given freedoms much sooner than you think. (Possibly as soon as November 4th of this year.) You won't want to miss my treatise affectively refuting liberalism - socialism. These two terms are synonymous and are an attempted semantic subterfuge for what they really are: communism. This presidential election is the most crucial one in our history and will decide if we remain a free republic or become a communistic satellite county. This is very very serious stuff, my beloved readers!!!
Later...
``MIKE`` {:-)

Even More Things Bill Gates Never Told You

2008-10-16T19:07:00.010-04:00

My laptop computer came with Vista. There are some things I don't care for in Vista. It took awhile to customize it so it pretty much looks like Windows XP, which is a great OS in my humble opinion. My server has XP, which I certainly prefer compared to Vista. One of the biggest problems with Vista is the email system. With XP, all you have to do is click on an email link on any web page and up pops your email default program such as Yahoo, Gmail, etc. With Vista, when you click any web page email link, instead of your default email, up pops MS Hot Mail, which I don't think is so "hot". In XP, it is very easy to set your default email program. This is not possible with Vista. MS Hot Mail is "hard wired" in the system to only use Hot Mail and you cannot change it to your default email program. Believe me, I've tried. Aggravating to say the very least if your default email isn't Hot Mail!

So, what can you do if you can't use your default email program? Well, I have a way around this. Just right click on the email link on the web page and choose "copy shortcut". Then open your preferred email program and simply paste the email link into the "To" address line, then go from there. This will save you a lot of aggravation when you always see the Hot Mail program turn up all of a sudden. If you're like me (heaven help you), you love to find easy ways around the "system".

I hope this will save you some time and frustration. It sure did me. One caveat, since some email links have the subject line automatically filled in for proper routing, it may pay you to let Hot Mail come up just to check this. If that is the case, then simply copy the subject and paste it into your email program.

In a future post, I will show you a foolproof method GUARANTEED to avoid ALL spam when you post your email address on chat groups, news groups, email news letters, on line shopping web sites, etc. Bet you can't wait for that one, huh! {:-o
(*) Mike (*)

Fall Photo

2008-10-16T10:03:00.005-04:00

Recently, I spotted these two beautiful kids at our stand checking out all of our pumpkins. I just couldn't resist taking a picture. In fact, they came to the farm for a visit that day. These two are the cutest kids I have ever seen in my life! I just thought I would share this with my many Blog readers. Hey! Wait a minute! I just noticed that these happen to be my grandkids, Ethan and Ally! How about that, I knew there was something familiar about them {;-)

<>~<>~<>~<>

Mike

<>~<>~<>~<>

The Answer to the Mystery!

2008-10-14T10:43:00.002-04:00

I just received a comment from a guy who gave the link where they acquired my email address! There is indeed a data base of Navy veteran's email addresses. Will the wonders ever cease!
Thank you, Tom! Now as to the other 281,814 mysteries I need an answer for... {:-O
^^Mike^^

A Real Mystery!!!

2008-10-14T05:07:00.000-04:00

I've always prided myself in saying that you can find anything on the Internet if you know how and where to look. Over the years, I have found things for people who were unsuccessful in finding things themselves on the Internet because I know where and how to look. The one thing that has always stumped me, though, is finding an email address for someone. If there is some super database with a directory of everyone's email on it, I sure haven't found it yet. This leads me to a real mystery. A while back, I received an email inviting me to a reunion of former crew members who served on my old ship, the Tattnall DDG 19, which was a guided missile destroyer. You don't want to know how long ago I got out of the Navy; even I don't want to know! Let's just say that the Tattnall was decommissioned several years ago. The big mystery to me is how they got my email. When I was in the Navy, it was long before email was even thought of, much less existed. As a former crew member, I could understand how they would know my name, but how did they know my email address? As far as I know, even the Navy doesn't know my email address, so how did they get it???? To the best of my knowledge, I've never emailed any of my old shipmates. Maybe they found that elusive email database that has everyone's name and email address for everyone in the world. I wish now that I would have saved that email and replied and ask how they got it. I guess they must know something I don't. But then again, most people know some things I don't, so what's one more thing.
--Mike--

More Things Bill Gates Never Told You

2008-10-13T16:15:00.003-04:00

In my job with the County Engineer's Department, I had both fieldwork and a WHOLE LOT of paper work. Alas, the perils of having a government job. I had hundreds of documents in Word and Excel. By default, I was the office expert in Excel since I used it daily and sometimes nightly when I had deadlines. In compiling hundreds of worksheets in Excel with several lines of the same entry, I found it too much trouble and time consuming to use the "copy" method of left clicking the mouse and dragging to copy only a few lines down the column. I always disliked having to move my hands off the keyboard when I was on a roll. However, I found a much quicker keyboard shortcut. When you need to copy the above information in a column, just hold Ctrl and hit the " key. The above information will automatically be copied to the line below. It sure is easier to do this, than to keep dragging for only a few lines. As far as I know, I've never seen this shortcut in any manual. This shortcut will greatly benefit all office workers, especially those of you who work for the government because you will now have more time for coffee breaks. {;-)

+) Mike (+

Fall Has Finally Fallen

2008-10-13T12:39:00.008-04:00

Is it my imagination, or is fall late this year. As shown in the photo, the leaves in our woods are finally starting to change colors today Oct. 13. It seems that in past years they started to change color in mid September. What is especially odd about this is that after a summer drought, as we had this year, the leaves change and start to fall even earlier. In any event, it seems as though they turned color overnight. Ah Huh! I have it! It is a scientific fact that leaves change color as a result of shorter days and less sunlight and more hours of darkness, which somehow signals them to turn color and fall off. Since they keep moving Day Light Savings Time later and later (this year it ends November 2), there is less darkness and thus the leaves change later. Hey, you cannot argue against that kind of logic. (I'm not even sure I can argue that kind of logic, but it sure explains it). {;-)

##Mike##

Things Bill Gates Never Told You

2008-10-05T19:24:00.005-04:00

As the sub title to my Blog states, "Now and then you may find something actually useful here", I have discovered some nifty shortcuts for computing that I either haven't seen anywhere else or have discovered on my own. Take for example Microsoft Internet Explorer which most of us use. I was getting tired of entering the entire web address of web sites that aren't in my "Bookmarks". I have found that all you have to do is to enter the main URL. For example, if I have a web site URL I would like to go to such as: www.GetBentTurkey.com, most everyone types in the whole thing i.e. www.GetBentTurkey.com. I have found a way that fills in the "www" and ".com for you. Simply type in the main URL GetBentTurkey, and then hold Ctrl and hit Enter, and the www. and .com are automatically added, thus saving you the trouble of always having to enter the whole URL! Give it a try and you will be amazed at the time and typing you will save. I have not seen this shortcut anywhere else, not even in the "shortcuts" in the I.E. Explorer help. I don't recall when or how I found this out, probably when I was entering a web site address and the cat walked on the keyboard. One thing though, it doesn't work for .org or anything other then .com. However, I am confident I will eventually find a way for those too. It shouldn't take too long because the cat quite often walks on my keyboard when I am typing.

Another cool shortcut that I discovered (OK, I found this out from someone else) is labeling photos. How many of us have hundreds of digital photos of our grandkids, pet cockroaches, or of Aunt Hortense's visit, etc. that we haven't labeled because it takes too much time and effort to label each one separately. Most of us, including me, never seem to get around to laboriously individually labeling all those photos and as a result, they end up unlabeled in some folder hidden in the dusty recesses of our hard drives. Rejoice digital photo shutterbugs! I have a cool shortcut for you to label all of your photos at once! Simply go to the folder that has all of your pics and select all of the ones you want to label for each event or whatever. After you have selected all of them go to the first one and hit "rename", then label it with the name, such as, My Tour of the Moose Jaw Alaska Landfill.jpg, etc. Then just click in a blank area of the screen and Presto! all of your pics are labeled with the title and the chronological number. It will look like this: My Tour of the Moose Jaw Alaska Landfill.jpg (2), (3), etc. On thing though, be sure to add .jpg in the first photo name, or it won't work. I found this out the hard way.

Well, dear Blog readers, I hope this will help you. You will not only rejoice in the timesaving of things you have been putting off, but you will also astound your friends who will think you are a computer genius (like me)! See, if you read my Blog long enough, you do indeed find something occasionally useful. Hey, 1 out of 2,914 postings "ain't" bad huh! I have MANY other time saving shortcuts I have discovered. However, I will only occasionally list some in future Blog postings. After all, I have to give people some RATIONAL reason to keep reading my Blog.
^*MIKE*^

From Nouns to Verbs

2008-10-05T15:50:00.003-04:00

I've noticed over the years the trend of using nouns in a verbal form. Of course, we all remember from High School English that a noun is a person, place, or thing and a verb shows action. WOW! I actually remember something from High School! Will the wonders never cease! Take for instance what I consider of earliest instance of this phenomenon. The word "party" is a noun and means to get together at a party and have a good time, in some instances let revelry go uninhibited. Not that I have ever been to a party like this. These days instead of someone saying that we went to a party, they say we "partied" last night, which is a classic case of a noun being used as a verb. Another more contemporary use is to look something up on Google. These days someone says that they "Googled" something. By the way, the name "Google" sounds like a baby coined the term. Actually, as only I would do, I researched this and found out the following:

Sean and Larry, the founders of "Google were in their office, using the whiteboard, trying to think up a good name - something that related to the indexing of an immense amount of data. Sean verbally suggested the word "googolplex," and Larry responded verbally with the shortened form, "googol" (both words refer to specific large numbers). Sean was seated at his computer terminal, so he executed a search of the Internet domain name registry database to see if the newly suggested name was still available for registration and use. Sean is not an infallible speller, and he made the mistake of searching for the name spelled as "google.com," which he found to be available. Larry liked the name, and within hours, he took the step of registering the name "google.com" for himself and Sergey (the domain name registration record dates from September 15, 1997). So there you have it just in case you were curious like I was or you would like to impress your friends the next time you "party".

Oh, by the way, I believe I am the first to convert a noun into a verb way back in 1953 when I was 4 ½. Check out the article from the Berlin Call Newspaper shown above. This is yet more proof that I never follow trends, I start them...

&~Mike~&

A "Beacon" of Hope

2008-10-01T15:42:00.003-04:00

Although I mentioned this in my last Blog entry, I have decided not to write about the dangers of cell phone use since it is too depressing and I've grown weary of always being right :-) Therefore, I would like to think about beacons. A beacon is a giant spotlight that reflects light from the clouds. To the southwest of my place, I can see the small beacon at the Huron County Airport rotating and shining at night. This reminded me of when I was a kid. Some nights we would see a big beacon light rotating and emitting a narrow very intense light bean aimed at an angle to the sky. We asked our Dad what it was and he said it was a beacon that was used to advertise a store grand opening or a sale of some sort. It was supposed to raise the curiosity of people to go see where its source was and to hopefully to patronize the business. We never got to go see the source of the light which was always very disappointing to me. Sadly, they don't use these anymore. I sure wished they did because now I would go check out the source. The beacon light was always both scary and fascinating to me. It was especially cool when it reflected off the clouds on a cloudy night. Gee, I sure wish they would bring these back so it would add some intrigue at night. Alas, yet another thing you don't see anymore from the good old days...
:: Mike ::

The "Full" Story

2008-09-26T16:53:00.003-04:00

I wanted to give Google a workout, so I looked up the phrase, "Does a full moon affect behavior?" Well, I found that the majority of opinions state that it does. I have held this belief for years based on empirical evidence of how others and I act during a full moon phase. I found that I needed less sleep and was more hyperactive, even more so than when I'm on my "Manic" highs. During these times, even my "Bipolar" medications don't seem to help much. It's good to know that my subjective and objective observations were indeed correct. As a matter of fact, the term "Lunatic" is based on bizarre behavior during the full moon phase. My next Blog subject will deal with the matter of the latest studies showing that cell phones can cause brain cancer. I'll give you a little preview. I've said this all along and again was proven right...

~)Mike(~

My Brain on Chemistry

2008-09-19T09:29:00.007-04:00

Greetings beloved readers. It's been a few weeks since I have been inspired to post any Blog comments. My usual reason is that I have been otherwise occupied (which is a code phrase that I just didn't feel like it). The older I get, the more problem I have been having with my short-term memory. As is obvious from my stories, my long-term memory is very acute. I went to my Psychiatrist the other day and he said that as we age, our short-term "working" memory decreases. He gave me some medication he said may improve my "working" memory. The really scary thing is that the medication is for the early onset of Alzheimer's disease! YIKES! I think my short-term memory is beginning to improve, however. I think tha.... Oops, I forgot what I was talking about... Oh, yes, when I was getting my haircut the oth... No wait, that's not what I was talking about! Ah NOW I remember... The orange elephant I saw on the way to the barn this morning wa... I guess medicine isn't an exact science, but overall, I do see some improvement with my problem of forgetting what I am saying presently. You know with this medication I am reall.........

"Wanted" Some Information

2008-08-26T14:49:00.002-04:00

I was at our local post office this morning and just got around to noticing that they don't have wanted posters hanging in the post office anymore. They may have been gone for years but I have never noticed until now. I asked the Post Mistress, or Postress, or Postette, or whatever lady postmasters are called these days about it. She didn't know the reason, but she suggested it may be a privacy issue. That made sense to me since criminals are being coddled more and more these days. It is my contention that we can blame the bleeding heart liberals for that. In fact I blame the bleeding heart liberals for all the problems in the world. Why would I do this you may ask? It's because they are!!!!!
Later...
++~Mike~++

Having a "Grand" Time

2008-08-26T10:11:00.003-04:00

Grand kids are a blast! My little grandson Ethan recently came to visit "Gonga's" (that's me) farm. He enjoyed visiting all of the animals we have around here, cats, dogs, horses, turkeys, cattle, etc. I can't wait until his sister, "Ally" is old enough to be in tow in my other hand. We are "sauntering" up the barn ramp to look at one of the tractors that Ethan really enjoyed sitting on. Ah, I envisioned him operating the tractor some day. Even better, helping us to bale hay!!!! It is really great having another generation, especially ones that can help bale hay someday! {;0)
"Gonga", the proud grandpa...

Nagging From Outer Space

2008-08-18T09:28:00.002-04:00

In all my years of driving, it is not all unusual for me to get lost. For a guy, I have always had a terrible sense of direction. I have been driving for 43 years. WOW! Time certainly marches on! At any rate, because of my horrible sense of direction, I purchased a GPS device. Now I can program in an address, and it will guide me to my destination. It even talks to me. I programmed in my church address, and it got me there and back, without my getting lost even once during the whole 1.68 mile drive! It takes a little time for it to analyze driving habits. After analyzing mine, it is starting to say, "Hey dummy, turn left not right". (It sounds just like my ex wife used to.) If I take a wrong turn anyway, it automatically recalculates my route. After only 6 recalculations on my way to church, it finally told me, "Forget it, just keep going your way and get lost as usual, you're on your own!". Today I have some books to take back to the library, so I'm going to program in the library address and give it a try for the 1.2 mile drive. I just hope that today it will give me a break and recalculates any wrong turns without nagging me and calling me a dummy. If I'm fortunate, its memory is as short as mine is, but I doubt that will be the case so, as usual, I'm allowing at least 20 minutes to get to the library while wearing the same earplugs that I used for all my driving when I was married the first time. {;-)

**)Mike(**

The First Accolade Of Our World Champion

2008-08-10T22:28:00.003-04:00

The World Champion Belt Buckle just arrived for our horse's World Champion standing! When I wear it, I'll have to wear my suspenders to keep the buckle upright, it's heavy. More stuff will eventually arrive and I will post more pics. Hey, if anyone wants our stud horse to sire any of your foals, let me know. However, I must tell you that the stud fees won't be cheap!!! ;-))
<~~Mike~~>

MEMPHIS MEMO

2008-08-09T09:37:00.004-04:00

One of our show horses, "Beezer" became the World Champion in Dun Factor (Color Class) at the International Buckskin Horse World Show in Memphis this morning! I was the one that choose the stud for "Beezer". Now they will have to admit that I know what I'm talking about relative to the selective breeding of horses. Our trainers and the "experts" suggested another stud for our mare and I persisted with the stud that sired our World Champion. I just had to post this right away because I'm not right that often in anything! More information will follow this in a day or two. I will, of course, post the World Champion official picture as soon as I get it!!!! I have to post this now because I can't wait to say to all of the "experts", "See, I told you so"!!! ;0)
~Mike~

Detected At Last!

2008-07-30T10:20:00.007-04:00

I recently purchased something I've desired for years. I got a swell metal detector at 40% off at Amazon. All this with free shipping too. When UPS delivered it yesterday, I excitedly assembled it and ran outside to test it and to learn how to use it. I was thrilled to make my first metal discovery! I found our old corn picker that has been parked in our woods for several years. After I finally found it I waved the detector about ½ inch over it and got a very loud positive tone, which indicated metal! I think metal detectors are great and I learned how to use it very quickly! I've been looking for our old corn picker in our woods for years and am so glad I finally found it with the help of my new metal detector!

After finding the corn picker, I decided to see how well it would find buried metal. I dug several holes with a shovel and finally found something that looked like a small piece of metal. I laid it on top of the ground and then got my new metal detector and turned it on and swept the small piece I had dug up and previously had laid on top of the ground. Sure enough it was metal! I guess I'm getting a little cocky because I learned how to use it so quickly and efficiently! Bah! Who needs to read the instructions! I figured out how to use it all on my own. I'm glad to know my thought patterns are not weakening due to old age like I thought!

The above picture shows my first discovery of the old corn picker thanks to my brand new metal detector. I can't wait to look for and find metal buildings, but will, no doubt, find and end up in a "mental" building instead thanks to my new "mental" detector. :0)

--Mike--

Retro "Ain't" Cheap!

2008-07-29T11:49:00.003-04:00

I recently scanned some old family slides I obtained. It sure takes me back looking at old family slides from the 1950's. One of my good memories is of the old steel lawn chairs they used to have. I was delighted to see one of the slides of my favorite lawn chairs in those days. I sat in that very chair many times as a kid in the 1950's at my grandparents' place in Norwalk. They were called "shell back" chairs. As a kid, I used to enjoy sitting in them and rocking back and forth. I never recall ever having the chair fall back wards no matter how much I rocked or leaned back. Over the years, I have grown weary of the cheap plastic lawn chairs made in some Chinese sweatshop. I recently received a catalog that actually had reproductions of the very same 1950's steel "shell back" chairs I enjoyed so as a kid. I was all set to order some when I noticed the price of $99.95 each! That's not including shipping and "handling" whatever that was. I didn't get past the inflated price to check on the additional expenses! Alas, I shall not have the opportunity to relive the past by sitting in one of these chairs. The picture above is one of the actual chairs that I used to sit in at my grandparent's place in Norwalk in the 1950's. It probably cost around $9.95 in those days. Alas, now all I have is my memories since they are free without paying $99.95 not including shipping and "handling" costs! The only problem with my memories is that I have to allow for depreciation of my brain! :0)

++Mike++

Great Link!

2008-07-20T05:28:00.000-04:00

Greetings all,
I've been otherwise occupied lately since summer has finally gotten here. I have a new story in mind for my web site, but haven't gotten around to writing it yet. One of my on line computer newsletters offered a really cool link. If you have a cell phone that has Internet capability (I wish mine did), check out this link the next time you are in a doctor's waiting room. You will probably get so engrossed, that the doctor will have to make an appointment to see you. This will also work for airport delays. In fact, you probably will cancel your flight and just fly standby once you get on this web site! You can also check out this link on your home computer, but be advised, it is addicting. Oh, by the way, here's the link: http://notalwaysright.com/
:: Mike ::

"Inhuman" Treatment

2008-07-15T18:17:00.004-04:00

The other day I made an appointment with my family physician in Milan. Earlier today, I received a phone call. The caller ID said "Arizona" followed by the number with an area code of 520. I checked and sure enough, the 520 area code is indeed from Arizona. Before I answered it, I tried to figure out who would be calling me from Arizona. Even though I'm on the "Do not call list", sometimes junk calls manage to slip through. I do know one guy from Arizona who shows buckskin horses like we do, so I figured it must be Doug. I took a chance and answered the call. Upon hearing the message, I just about fell over. The call was to remind me of my physician's appointment in Milan this Thursday. All well and good. However, in the first place, the caller wasn't even a human. It was a computer voice synthesizer. At least they tried to make it sound like a female voice. In the second place, the call came from somewhere in Arizona! I can't figure out why my physician's office in Milan would hire a phone reminder service in Arizona. The office isn't that big! What ever happed to real people doing this type of thing? I suppose that people are all "gaa gaa" over all the new electronic gadgets out there these days. I wouldn't be surprised that one of these days when I go to my appointment, that the doctor will be some kind of android. I can hear the computer synthesized voice now "G-O-O-D M-O-R-N-I-N-G. P-L-E-A-S-E T-U-R-N Y-O-U-R H-E-A-D A-N-D C-O-U-G-H". (I sure hope the programmers remember to add hardware that will heat its fingers!)
M-I-K-E :-)

"Rack'n" Up the Years

2008-07-11T12:09:00.002-04:00

I was taking another nostalgic walk through the old Berlin Hts. schoolyard earlier today and as usual, stopped to look over the old bicycle rack. It is still in the same place it always was and it has been there as long as I can remember. It was there all through the years I was in school. Let's see, it's been 42 years since I graduated. Yeoow! Now that is really depressing! It was there as long as I can remember all through my school years so I can add another 12 years, which makes it 54 years. Hey! I wonder why I am writing this Blog entry because now it is really getting me depressed! I'm sure it was there long before I started school so I'm not sure just how long it really has been there. I suppose any of those who know are most likely dead or too senile to remember their own names. It is interesting to observe that even the same bent rods are still there when I was a kid. In fact, I used to park my bicycle in it when I rode it to school --- years ago. (I can't bear to again write the number of years.) In this rapidly changing world, it's refreshing and encouraging to gaze upon this immutable landmark and remember the way things used to be some --- years ago. (Huh Ah, I'm still not going to recall how many at this point.)

*~Mike~*