“Phony” Logic

These days public phones are a dying breed. Everywhere I look there are very few if any public phones anymore. Several places have removed public phones altogether with the exception of a few places that may still have only one when they formerly had a whole wall lined with them. Even the very few places you can still find an outdoor public phone, the booths are gone and it is an open aired drive up phone. Of course, this is because of the proliferation of cell phones these days.  Just as email has killed the Post Office, cell phones have killed public phones and the income derived from them.

At this point, I must confess that with the extinction of public phones, I reluctantly and against my wishes, purchased a cellular TracPhone after I got married a few years ago. Technically speaking it isn't a regular cell phone and is not meant for everyday use. I wanted to make that very clear so no one would accuse me of being a hypocrite (at least this time.) The ONLY use I have for it is to take on long trips, and its ONLY use is in the event of an emergency while traveling.  There's no monthly fee, it operates on buying time. My rationale for getting it, in spite of the fact I detest cell phones, is that my wife is handicapped and I may need to contact someone if she has any sudden physical problems during a rare long trip. The phone number is unpublished and no one else has it.

Well, as long as I'm on this expedition, yet another reason I don't like cell phones is when I'm out shopping or for that matter, anywhere in public, people's cell phones are always ringing. At least the latest cell phone fad is to have music play when a call comes in, and not that irritating electronic ring sound. I've rarely, if ever, have heard any conversations that served any useful purpose. The following is a typical example of the kinds of one-sided "important" cell phone conversations I often overhear:

Harpsichord music... Hello... Oh, hi Lyle what's up?... I'm not doing anything right now either... I don't know what I'm doing tonight... Oh, you either... I'm at Wal-Mart right now and walking down the laxative aisle... Yeah, they have all colors... Huh? Your cell phone faded and I only got 2 or 3 words... Oh, you didn't get all of my last words either... I said they have all different colors of laxatives in this aisle...No, I don't see any speckled ones... Now I'm just starting to go past the ladies underwear section... Huh?... I don't know if they still make Playtex Living Bras, how would I know, you'd have to ask my wife... Oh all right, wait a minute, I'll go back and look... I said wait a minute and I'll go back and look... I said I'll look... LOOK LOOK!... Hey Lyle, please don't tell any of the other guys at the Yugo plant that I'm looking for Playtex Living Bras!... Well, you know how Sidney is... ha ha yeah right... Hey, there's some dust on the floor... I said there's some dust on the floor... THERE'S SOME DUST ON THE FLOOR!!!!! Hello, Hello, LYLE? LYLE? Are you there? STUPID cell phones!!!!!!...... (Same guy 4.68 seconds after losing Lyle on his cell phone) Harpsichord music... Oh, hi Walter what's up?... I'm not doing anything right now either... I don't know what I'm doing tonight... Oh, you either... I'm at Wal-Mart right now and I'm walking through the house wares aisle... By this time, I've started to make  yet another hasty retreat to another section of Wal-Mart only to hear more electronic music in that section! UGHHHH! As Martha and the Vandellas so fittingly sung it in 1964, "No where to run to, baby nowhere to hide..."!!!

If cell phones aren’t bad enough, texting really puzzles me. If someone wants to talk to someone, why bother with texting? Wouldn’t it be easier just to call them? Well, that’s a subject for a future post.

Blog Entry 2.0

I decided to blow the dust off my old Blog that was once teaming with daily and twice daily postings. I noticed that almost a year ago practically to the day I made a MEMO to myself to post entries more often. Well, I see I didn't keep that intent. Maybe I had better do that now since it appears I will get yearly reminders from my deepest subconscious mind to post something. My problem is that Facebook still has me in its powerful grip.

I noticed that since I was here a year ago, sometime during that time they changed the format of Blog entries. They call it "improvements"- I call it aggravation due no doubt to the desire to keep all their software engineers employed. It is somewhat more difficult to navigate the site now. I've noticed that on several web sites these days. It is a trend to make things more complicated. Either it is a major conspiracy or I'm getting older and can't figure things out like I used to. Wait.... I'm sure it's a major conspiracy. I don't like to ever admit I'm getting older and slower. At least I will admit I'm not growing old gracefully.

I shall add more later. Hmmm, "later" could be a year from now or maybe sooner. I shall see....
Mike :-)

Memo to Self

MEMO

To: Self
Re: BLOG Postings

Try to make new BLOG postings more often than once every time there is a 2nd blue moon on the 2nd Tuesday of months with letters that start with "F".

Regards,
Self

Making My "Case"

For a long time I have wondered, "What's with some people typing postings and other things all in lower case letters?" It always aggravates me when I see that. It really aggravates me when I see it on web sites where there are people's names on memorials on Findagrave.com which are used for genealogical research and they are either all in lower case letters or their middle initial is. I'm so used to using proper case, that even when the rare times I chat on Facebook I always use the proper capitalization for sentences and names and so do all the people my age. Obviously it is a result of those my age that learned English long before computers and texting. It is in our genes.

One day it finally hit me. I have never texted nor ever intend to. I'm assuming that when one sends a text that there is no way to make capital letters. I'll have to defer to someone who does text to answer that. That would indeed explain how people get into that habit. I sure wish they would change gears and use the proper case when not texting. This leads me to another paradox. When people have a cell phone wouldn't it be a whole lot easier just to talk to someone as opposed to sending a text with those tiny keyboards? I don't think I could even send a text if I wanted to since my fingers are so large. Oh well, another mystery to add to my growing list.

Oh, by the way, as long as I'm on the subject... It is also a mystery to me why there are so many spelling errors in things like newspapers, etc. that I'm sure are created by word processors that have spell check. Consequently, I can never understand why people don't use it when they publish things with such obvious spelling errors.

Is it just me, or has the world passed me by? I suspect the former as opposed to the latter.
8>}

A "Boring" Time

My goodness! This is the 2nd entry I've made in only 2 weeks! Indeed, the wonders never cease! I'm just killing time until my after lunch dentist appointment. I've already made myself a nuisance on Facebook, so I thought I'd make myself a nuisance here until the appointment time.

I'm probably one of the few people my age who still have their original teeth, which is a miracle in itself considering how I've seriously abused them my whole life. Every time I go to see my dentist I always request her to pull all of my teeth and get me dentures. Of course she always tells me I should keep my teeth. I think having dentures is very beneficial because if there's any problems, I can just drop them off at the dentist and come and pick them up later. Hopefully in the mean time I wouldn't get an obsessive uncontrollable urge for rock candy or jaw breakers and such.

It's ironic that as many years as I have been going to her that she always asked me if I take Novocaine. My answer is always the same, "Yes, unless you want to scrape me off the ceiling the first time you touch any tooth." I also always make a song request for her to try and find, "Comfortably Numb" by Pink Floyd. She always laughs but I'm never sure if she actually forgets my wise crack or is just being polite. I'd like to think her memory is getting as bad as mine and she thinks it's the first time she has ever heard it.

Well, it's getting close to the time I must leave. It's ironic that going to a dentist is that you pay a lot of money for something you neither like or want. I'll just add that to my list of hundreds or life's ironies I will never understand.....
Later...

Bumper Stickers Revisited...

My goodness! I noticed that the last time I posted on here was April! I guess my New Year's Resolution to post more Blog stuff is found lacking.

Well, let's see what fascinating entry I can conger up. I recently acquired another one of my all time favorite vehicles, (other than a 1957 Ford which stems from my Baby Boomer genes). I have another Ford Ranger. It's a 2001 with just over 100,000 miles which is low for a 2001 Ranger. Now I have my 2 favorite modern vehicles: a Jeep Wrangler and a Ford Ranger. Now I can haul bags of horse feed in the truck bed and not in the rear of the Jeep. I love the smell of molasses horse sweet feed, but all the little pieces of oats and corn that amass on the rear Jeep carpet were getting aggravating.

Now I (finally) come to my main thesis of this Blog post. Shortly after I got the truck, I went out to find a bumper sticker for it. I seem to have a bumper sticker compulsion, (so what's one more).

Freshly applied bumper sticker on my Ranger (A reminder of my Navy days)

I wrote a story about bumper stickers on my web site a few years ago. I can just save time and post the link so I can keep this entry short. HEE HEE. The story link:
http://www.quarterhorse3.us/bumper_snickers.html

This is me (no April) Fooling

Well, I see its April Fool's Day. You could have fooled me. When I was a kid, we used to really take this day seriously. On the other hand, it certainly didn't even come anywhere close to Christmas, which is the biggest day in a kid's life.

Now after all these years, it's just another day and one that hopefully no one will play any April Fool jokes on me. I always am on guard the whole day from 12:01AM April 1 until 12:01 AM April 2. You can never be too sure about some people who seem to live for this day.

When Tim and I were kids, we came up with what we always thought was THE quintessential April Fool's day joke. We always wanted to switch the salt with the sugar. Now that is really "down and dirty". The irony of it all was that I cannot recall that we ever actually did it.

Oh well, I shall get back to my vigilance in watching for any jokes on me.

Until later,

"Time" for Another Entry

Is it my imagination, or does the time change date keep getting later? It seemed when I was a kid, the time change to EST was in early October now it's early November. Be that as it may, I'm starting the "fall behind" clock settings early this time. I have already changed the easy ones which includes the vehicles and the bedroom digital clocks. The reason I have to get at least a 10-hour head start is that I have so many of them to change. Here's a list that I can think of at the moment, there may be more added later that I forgot about:

1. The kitchen wall clock

2. The electric range clock

3. The microwave clock

4. The Jeep clock

5. The living room DVD player clock

6. The 2 bedroom clocks

7. The DVD player in the bedroom

8. The living room wall clock

9. Ava's wristwatch

10. The clock on the VCR tape player (Yeah, I still have a few of those relics lying around).

11. The short wave radio clock

Fortunately, the other clocks change the time themselves.

I have not worn a wristwatch in years. I don’t need to because starting in the kitchen where I am happily pounding away at the computer keys, I can see the current time in the following devices:

1. Desktop computer

2. Laptop computer

3. Short wave radio

4. Electric range

5. Microwave

6. Cell phone

7. Brinks Alarm Console

8. Caller ID machine

9. The phone call router (This little gem is a product of modern technology to eliminate junk calls. I'll describe this wonder of American engineering and Chinese construction some other time).

10. Cordless phone

11. Kitchen wall clock

12. Voice mail machine

The living room:

1. Wall clock

2. TV clock

3. DVD player clock

4. Cordless phone clock

5. The wireless weather station clock (This has an atomic clock which is self setting and is accurate to something like .0000000009999 second every million years or so, which I guess is close enough for me. However, during a nuclear attack, it will probably end up a few billionths of a second off).

6. Ava's wristwatch, that I never see her take off. (I think she was born with it on her wrist)

Outside:

1. The vehicle clock

2. The cell phone

The bedroom:

1. Alarm clock

2. The other alarm clock

3. TV clock

4. DVD player clock

5. VCR tape player clock

Let's see, that's 23 clocks so far. I'm SURE there are more, but I will think of them about 2 seconds after I post this Blog entry. I always lament the fact that they never give the time on the radio anymore, but then it dawned on me... Why should they? It would be redundant with so many clocks around us! Well, it's "time" I posted this and get back to setting all the timepieces around here an hour back. I want to beat the rush and not have to get up at 2:00 AM to do it. Later.....

{}MiKe{}

Season "Reruns"

When I was a kid, I always hated to see reruns on TV every summer. I always figured the TV people were too lazy to make programs all year round. Of course in those innocent childhood days I didn't know about vacations and budgets and the need for actors and crews to take breaks. I know about all those things now from an adult perspective. I just don't have the ambition lately to make any new brilliant Blog entries as a result of my gift of imagination and originality, hence, I shall now offer a Blog "rerun" sort of speak.

Since Halloween is tomorrow, which is very difficult to believe, I offer on old Halloween story from the dusty old story vault on my web site...

http://www.quarterhorse3.us/halloween_capers.html

I trust the next time you, my faithful readers, will be able to peruse a new original and brilliant post to ponder...

*~MiKe~*

Making the "Grade"

I recently found my grade card from the 1^st grade. It was on the bottom of an old dust covered box. You never know what you're going to find in old dust covered boxes, it is always an adventure. Sometimes I actually find something that solves an old mystery such as the instructions I lost back in the 1970s for the Rubik's Cube I had. I could never figure out how to solve it, but I always had the excuse that I lost the instructions.

If you will note, you will see that there are both regular letter grades, and "S" grades which as the key states mean "Satisfactory Attitudes". I noticed that I got an "S-" in neatness. I didn't even know "Satisfactory Attitude" grades could get a "-". Frankly, I'm very surprised I didn't always get a "U-" for my appearance due to a persistent cowlick I've always had. I've always had an unkempt appearance due to my curly unfettered hair that has never been able to be tamed by man nor beast. The only time my hair ever looked the least bit acceptable was when they shaved it all off in Navy Boot camp. That sure took care of the cowlick! I also have a perpetual ruddy appearance due to a life long heavy dark beard which is the result of an over abundance of testosterone.

Fortunately, Mrs. Hahn showed mercy and I was "Assigned to Grade 2". For 12 years, I always looked with extreme trepidation every time I checked the bottom line, and was always relieved to see that I was assigned to the next higher grade! Frankly, I believe the teachers didn't want to have to spend another whole school year with me, so they shunted me off to the next higher grade teachers. At the teachers' coffee time after school when they talked about all of their incorrigible students, I'm sure they said in a sarcastic tone to the lower grade teacher, "Thanks a lot for sticking us with Mike; you are permanently banned from my Christmas card list!"(The rest of my grade card that has the regular letter grades is on the reverse side. I wasn't sure how the Blog page would react with 2 photos uploaded since I have never attempted it before. In my younger days I would have tried it, but in my older years I don't have the sense of adventure to live in the fast lane any more).

I shall look forward to finding more dust-covered boxes and discovering what other treasures lay therein. Whatever it is, I'm sure it will be interesting and will provide more material for my next Blog entry.

Later... ~MiKe~

Obsessing on Obsessions

Well, once again I have torn my self away from Facebook long enough to make another rare Blog entry…. I had to go check FB just now to see if I had an answer to my last post. It’s a good thing there is no real-time in posting, or the post would take a long time to read with all the breaks in them with me getting sidetracked so easily.

My latest interest (OK, obsession if you will) is taking photos for Findagrave.com. It is a cool web site that has memorials and pictures of cemetery headstones. There are famous people and just regular people. I have put most of my family and relation on it. It’s home base in Salt Lake City, so I suspect it is sponsored by the Mormons since they are very much experts on genealogy. It is a good source for genealogical studies.

What has been taking a lot of my time and interest lately is that I’m a volunteer photographer for it too. I check the requests that people send in requesting photos of head stones of family members in the cemeteries in my area. I then go out and try and find them and upload photos. I have provided about 47 photos for families. The messages I get from appreciative families really make my day. I have been in dozens of area cemeteries and have seen literally thousands of head stones.

Its fascinating work and none of my subjects ever complain. I can work when I want to and take as long as I want to photograph head stones. It’s just like the government job I retired from so I feel right at home.

If I’m not on Facebook, I am probably out head stone hopping in some area cemetery. Between the 2 of them, updated postings here will no doubt still be few and far between. But I believe in quality more than quantity. Hmmmm, this sounds like as good an excuse as any. Now I must run and check FB and Findagrave.com to check on the latest…….

“The Circle is Now Complete”

I quoted the line from Darth Vader to celebrate the fulfillment of the dream of all Three Stooges Fans, of which I so proudly hale. After 51 years they finally have all 190 Three Stooges shorts remastered and in chronological order on DVD! They have, of course, had them for years on Video and DVD, and of course I have them all, but never in chronological order and digitally remastered! I just received the final volume this morning. I will watch the last 32 shorts on volume 8 with “mini Three Stooges Marathons” as I often do. This is indeed a major accomplishment and one I hoped would be accomplished in my life time. Don’t expect to see many of us Three Stooges fans for the next few days. We shall be basking in “Three Stooges Paradise”. NYUK NYUK NYUK!!!!!
~MIKE~

An Old Dream Fullfilled

My goodness, I see that I've been neglecting my Blog as usual! It's hard to believe that Memorial Day is a week from today! As usual, I am looking forward to the Memorial Day parade in my small rural home town. I am a member of our American Legion Color Guard but due to arthritis in the hips and every other major joint, this year I'm going to have to ride the entire parade route to the cemetery and Memorial Drive. I am definitely NOT growing old gracefully. I remember when I was a kid and watched the Memorial Day parade, I said to myself someday I will be a Legionnaire and march with the veterans. I have been doing that for several decades now. I remember the first year I fulfilled that desire and marched with the vets I watched as a kid. It was a feeling of a life long dream fulfilled that I will never forget. In those days my Navy dress blues fit with room to spare. Now they hang in the closet under a thick coating of decades of dust build up. In those days when I was a kid, the World War I veterans would always ride to the cemetery, then the World War II veterans started to ride, then the Korean War vets. Now veterans my age are starting to ride to the cemetery and back to Memorial Drive. Time sure plays some subtle tricks. I'm sure some of the kids who will watch us veterans march in the Memorial Day parade next Monday will have the same dreams I did, to someday march with the veterans in the American Legion. They will remember we "old veterans" that had to ride in cars to the cemetery because the march was too long for their arthritic laden joints. I will wave at them out the car window during the whole parade route this Monday and think back to the time I was on the sidewalk watching and dreaming what seemed to be just a "few" years ago.

One Track Mind

The older I get, the more difficult it is becoming to do more than one thing at a time. The modern trendy word is "multi tasking". I'm still very involved and focused (actually obsessed would be a better word), with Facebook. Once and a while, such as now, I get inspired to make another Blog entry. This is because for the moment (i.e. "nano" second), I have resisted the urge to click on my "FB" short cut icon and clicked on the "My Blog" icon, hence, ending up here.

I have made a pre New Years Resolution (to avoid the New Year's Day rush), to spend more time on my Blog, thus, no longer depriving the world of my brilliant insights. Hmmm, another case in point of my lack of being able to do more than one thing at a time, since I can not think of any more superlatives at the moment.

I have concluded the best way not to forget something is to make a list and a schedule. Therefore, I will try and adhere to the following 2010 schedule to post things in this Blog on or about the following dates:
Jan. 29
March 2
June 31
October 24

Please bear in mind that this schedule is not inclusive and I may post things more often if I should happen to click on the "My Blog" icon rather than the "FB" icon which would be a result of another failure to "Multi Task" at that moment.

Ohhh, yes, my Blog!

My goodness! I noticed I haven't made any Blog entries since May! Well, it's the same old reason. I'm still all agog with Facebook. My apologies to my faithful and loyal Blog fans who no doubt have been wondering where I have been the last few months. I've been enjoying the wonderful autumn weather we have been having around here lately. We just finished the last of the hay baling for the season. The vegetable stand is booming and Tim has been doing a lot of business lately.

Well now, let's see.... Do I have any other exciting news to share with the Blog World right now??? Oh yes! I am going to get a haircut this week! Hey, since I am retired, that's a big deal for me to make that "long" trip to Huron!!!!

I shall be resolved to make Blog postings more often when I have additional exciting news. Be watching for an entry later next week when I tell about my grocery shopping trip! Be ready to hear about my life in the "fast lane" if you can handle it!
Later fans...
Mike {:)

“Thumb Driving”

I purchased something the other day that is both a marvel of Japanese electronic engineering and Chinese construction. It is what is commonly known as a “Thumb drive”. Most of you readers no doubt know what these little gems are for, but if not; they are used to store digital information. It is just a simple matter of plugging this little gadget into a USB port of any computer and downloading files. It can then be used to transfer the files to another computer, or if you wish, store the information.

This little marvel has saved me from having to burn information from my desktop server onto a CD then having to transfer it to my laptop. When I have completed this, I then have a used CD that I either have to throw away or fly like a Frisbee into our fields. The one thing I will miss, however, is flying the CD into the field, but technology and convenience are the order of the day. Alas, advanced technology trumps fun in any form.

The one I have holds 2 gigabytes of information. When I observe how small the thing is, I have to wonder how all that information can possibly fit into it. I wonder if it compresses it like compressed air. If this is the case, then I have fears for my safety. If I should accidently drop it or if the cat should start playing with it and it falls on the floor, will it explode and kill the cat and/or me with 2 billion pieces of digital shrapnel? I can see it now, I’d have to go to the local emergency room and wait while some intern spends days removing all those 2 billion “1’s” and “0’s from all over my body!

I’m surprised that the instructions do not have any warnings about this.
For example:

WARNING!
NEVER attempt to use this product without first taking extreme safety measures to prevent this product from falling on the floor. This could cause an explosion of data that can injure, maim, or kill both people and curious cats. Do not attempt to use this product unless you are wearing a flack vest. Please keep all children and pets at least 829 feet away from the work area.

In the event this product does fall on the floor and doesn’t explode, call your local law enforcement bomb disposal squad immediately and move all people, children, pets, and valuables at least 1,061 feet away from the affected area.

Oh well, I guess this is the price one has to pay for convenience and not being able to have fun with used CDs.

The picture shows me taking precautions before using my thumb drive. For safety, I'm going to use it outside on my new deck.

“All Hands on Deck”

Ah yes, a blast from the past from my Navy days. After 15 years of talking about it, we are finally building a deck. Its not that we have put it off, it is because at my age, I don’t rush into things like I used to. I only grocery shop once every 6 months because I want to make sure my shopping list is complete before rushing off all half cocked, which is better than half baked which is my natural tendency.

My nephew is constructing it and is only charging me $6.28 cents per hour labor, or $24.61 if I help. In my younger days, I would have built my deck myself. In those days, I didn’t know how to do things like that, but just went ahead and did them anyway. I don’t have the confidence to do things like that now because now not knowing how to do something prevents me from doing it. Old age plays tricks like that on me.

We have plans to throw some home grown 2 inch thick Angus steaks on the gas BBQ grill; plop ourselves down at our patio table with a big umbrella, tune the XM satellite radio to the 60’s channel and turn it up loud (we have no close neighbors), and feast on our own natural beef. I do still have confidence to do that, at least for now. As I get older and realize that I don’t know how to BBQ steaks, I will hire some Yuppie from a new subdivision to come and BBQ our steaks for us. They seem to have a natural talent for BBQing steaks and getting rid of crabgrass. All I’ll need to supply him are the steaks and an apron that says, “Head Chef”.

In the meantime, the sweet aroma of our own natural home grown 2 inch thick Angus steaks will be wafting from my brand new gas BBQ grill sitting on my brand new deck. I will enjoy my steaks in spite of the fact that I don’t know how to BBQ nor will I notice all the crab grass surrounding my new deck… At least for the time being…

M. {;-)

My Latest Facebook Video!

Due to popular request by some of my loyal fans who are not on Facebook.com yet (shame on you), I am posting my latest video of my Berlin Local School, Berlin Heights, OH Memories series. This and several others of my videos are posted on my Berlin Heights and Berlin Heights Alumni Facebook Groups.

I could withhold these videos from you non Facebook members, but to show you I’m a regular guy, I have posted it for you. (“Ain’t” I a swell guy).

Check it out…

Eureka! It Was Not a Dream!!!

Being a typical "Baby Boomer", I am always on constant vigilance looking for anything from the "Good Ole Days" or a reasonable facsimile there of. This morning I made a marvelous discovery at, of all places, the small neighborhood supermarket in Huron where I shop!

While scanning the shelves bulging with the typical present day boring cloned tasteless soft drinks that come only in cans, my cynical 6-decade-old eyes came to a screeching halt on GLASS bottles of Grape Nehi! After making sure it was not a dream and recalling that I took my morning lithium dose, I inadvertently yelled out, "Oh my goodness, its grape Nehi!!!" Occasional extemporaneous mild out bursts of this nature are certainly no surprise to the store people since they are used to me. However, one Gen X lady customer looked somewhat bewildered and very warily looked at me with an "I hope he's harmless grin".

The ingredients are the same and it is made with sugar and not the goofy corn syrup that all pop (soda to my Northeast friends, and you KNOW who you are) is made with these days.

My first slow glorious sip of this bottle of "Nectar of the Baby Boomers" was an instant magical flashback to the days when pop (aka soda) was really good! It "ain't" cheap, but I did my patriotic duty to stimulate both the economy and my old brand pop (soda) depraved gullet. For the first time in my life, I am going to be looking forward to going grocery shopping!!!!!

Now if I could just find a pack of Blackjack gum to chew while on those short trips in a 1957 two door Chevy to "Baby Boomer Paradise"! I will certainly make it a point to meet with the store manager next time. I am POSITIVE he will say, "The Blackjack gum is right next to the Grape Nehi".

Rats! Its 4:30 and I missed my noon Lithium dose! Oh well, maybe Blackjack gum would not go very well with Grape Nehi anyway...

Now the Whole World Knows! Yikes!

I've been having a blast on Facebook and YouTube lately. For you facebook members (and future members), I started some FB Groups: Berlin Heights Residents Past and Present:
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=home#/group.php?gid=68919065476

And Berlin Heights High School Alumni 1950 - 68:
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=home#/group.php?gid=58442669349

I also have Video Stories on my Group and YouTube. For you non Facebook users, here's a sample of one story on YouTube (There are 3 of them so far. Search YouTube under: "Berlin Local School" to see the rest of them.

My Worse Nightmare!

No, it’s not Rambo. I should be so lucky. It’s my old High School English teacher Miss. Purcell! I had one of my worse nightmares of all time about her last night! As of right now I am definitely going to stop eating my regular midnight snack of whipped cream, catsup, honey, saltwater taffy, rutabagas, fried liver and onions flavored ice cream, and pork chops before I go to bed from now on! (Bear in mind that my nickname in High School was “Crow”.) In my nightmare, she kept saying to me, "How about a little sentence diagramming scare"crow"! EHHHH HEHHH HEHHH!

"We Don't Get Fooled Again"!

According to the calendar, last Friday was supposed to be the first day of spring. Well today, it was a high of 41! Some spring. They say the best sign of spring is to see red winged blackbirds coming back from the south.

Well, I saw a red wing black bird yesterday. The high temperature yesterday was in the high 30's. Obviously, this red wing blackbird believed the calendar but found it was obviously not spring yet! The last I saw of it was when he threatened a Red Tail Hawk at gunpoint to fly him back south. Oh, you don't believe me huh! Well I'll have you know that I happened to get a picture of it as it flew away heading south! So there!

M {;>)

A Great Day!!!

I just got the latest volume of the Three Stooges Collection! Forget Facebook, I have something better. Of course, I have all the Stooges on VHS and DVD, but these DVD volumes are in chronological order and digitally enhanced which is something never done before. I am probably one of the most avid fans ever and have the equivalent of a SoD (Doctor of Stoogeology) degree. Just 4 more volumes to go until I have all 197 episodes. I can hardly wait until volume 6 is ready to pre order from Amazon. Well, I am going get off of Facebook for awhile so the Facebook servers can cool down. I am off to warm up the DVD player. Woo Woo Woo...

Mike {;-()

“In Your Dreams”

Like everyone else, I have certain things I would like to accomplish before I die. It would be interesting to take a poll here and list what things you my readers would like to accomplish before you die.

I, of course, have many things I would like to accomplish before I leave this world for the celestial one. My list would be long indeed. Along this time of year as June approaches, I always start thinking about our Annual Berlin Heights High School Alumni Association Banquet and every year at this time I have my yearly fantasy of doing a certain daring act. As a matter of fact, I’ve been planning to do it for over 40 years on the night before our Alumni Banquet and hopefully start a new national trend. This would fulfill the fantasy of not having had the courage to do it while I was in High School. Since I’m not getting any younger, I really hope I can finally gin up the courage to really do it this June. I sure hope the ladder is handicap accessible…

What I Did on My Facebook Vacation

Hmmm, I see that I have not been on my illustrious Blog lately. I must confess it is because lately I have been all "ga ga" about Facebook and the fascinating world of social networking, or in some cases social engineering. I am trying to balance my time between Facebook and my Blog. So far, it has been way out of balance in Facebook's favor. However, I intent to correct the imbalance with a counter weight. That way I can spend more time on Facebook and not feel guilty about not posting here as much. This may prove to be a bane for my Blog readers, or a relief, depending on how you look at it ;-) Rest assured, beloved readers, that I will eventually maintain a better balance and redirect my obsessions back here. Well, I must get back to Facebook to see if I have anymore "Friend Requests".
Later...

M.

Prescription Drug Warning!!!

Like most everyone these days, I have been taking fish oil capsules. The main reason is to lower my high cholesterol as a result of a lifetime of over indulgence of fried stuff. A few months ago my physician prescribed what I call “industrial strength super fish oil capsules”. They are very expensive because the fish oil is ultra concentrated much more than the type one can purchase “over the counter”. However, after taking these “industrial strength” fish oil caps, I have discovered good and bad benefits. The good benefit is that my cholesterol is rapidly lowering. The bad news is that all of that super concentrated fish oil is having a very frightening side effect. The picture below proves my point! It wouldn’t be so bad except for the fact that I can only sleep at night in the bathtub filled with cold water!

“Over Exposed”?

It just occurred to me as I just signed off on Facebook, that I am becoming omnipresent and ubiquitous on the Internet. Let me summarize. I have a web site, a Blog, a Yahoo Group, I’m on Facebook, planning to be on My Space, planning to start a podcast, and on some other web sites I have designed and maintain, and probably several other places on the Internet.

Below is a recent picture of me. Yep, I’m definitely over exposed these days!

“Spaced Out”

I figured it was about time to offer something useful again in this Blog. For those of us who enjoy watching satellites and space junk orbiting the sky, I found a cool site to do just that. It lists times and locations to see cool stuff from any location in the world.

It may take a little time to learn how to navigate the web site since it is a typical poorly designed site so prevalent these days. Of course, any site not designed by me is hard to navigate {;-)

Now I can’t wait for a warm night to go looking. The way this winter is going, it might be some time before I can spend a few minutes outside at night without getting frostbitten eyes.

Happy hunting! http://www.heavens-above.com/

Mike

Free Parking

Among the hundreds of things I used to see as a kid but do not see now, but wished I still did, are people that park their pencils behind their ears. When I was a kid, all clerks, etc. always had a pencil behind their ear. I believe the main cause of the demise of this practice these days is because most information is now recorded on a word processer or spread sheet program on a lap top computer. No one seems to write things down with a pencil or pen on a pad of paper any more.

What mystifies me is in keeping with the times, why people these days don’t park their wireless mouse behind their ear. It works for me…

But then again, I have always been on the cutting edge of new trends!

Pardon My “Backfire”

I heard something last night that I haven’t heard in years. About 10 PM I heard a big noise something like a firearm going off. That’s not unusual for us since we often fire our rifles, shotguns, and pistols from the porch at night at pesky woodchucks or skunks. I peered out the door and suddenly heard another explosion. This time it had a deep bass sound like a big mortar firing. The next morning I ask Tim about it and he saw that it was a truck backfiring as it slowed to turn down the intersection east of our place.

This is very unusual in this day and age because all engines are run by a computer and I haven’t heard any backfiring in several years. It must have been a very old truck I assume.

When we were kids, long before engine computers, we used to love backfires. There were two ways to produce backfires. One was by removing the “vacuum” advance hose on our car engines. As a result, several neat backfires would ensue while slowing down for a turn. The other way was the best, but often resulted in dire consequences. This was performed while traveling at highway speeds, then turning off the ignition key for a few seconds, then turning it back on. The result would be a gigantic backfire that sounded like a cannon going off! Unfortunately now and then it would blow our mufflers apart. Oh well, a small price to pay for a cool backfire. When our mufflers exploded as a result, we would just go the Norwalk Bargain Center and buy a new Cherry Bomb muffler for 5 dollars.

My one regret is that I turned off my ignition while going very fast one time and blew up both of my beloved dual glass pack mufflers. Most agreed that my dual glass pack mufflers on my 1955 Ford had the coolest sound around in 1966. Cherry Bomb mufflers never sounded the same after that. Oh well, the backfire was one of my all time best since it was in stereo and all our friends who heard it were impressed and said I was “cool”. I guess it was worth 10 dollars to be cool for a few minutes.

The pics below are of my 1955 Ford that I had in 1966. Note the cool duals with the glass pack mufflers before I blew them up!!!! :-(

My Other Halve(s)

I recently I did a Facebook search of my own name and found that there are 4 others on Facebook with the same name as mine!!!! All these years I thought I was the only one in the world with my name. Now I wonder if I am schizophrenic. Aha! That would explain why my psychiatrist always charges me only half his hourly rates for each of my sessions.

Now if I could only find one more guy with my name I could play basketball by myself and have a whole team! I guess schizophrenia has its advantages indeed!

Well at least now we know.

More later…
Mike, Mike, Mike, and Mike ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-)

One Wish

We all have fantasies of what we would wish for if some genie appeared out of some lamp and granted us one wish. In my case hopefully there would be no small print that prohibits from asking for more wishes. On the other hand, I’m sure any genie that is legitimate would have this contingency covered.

If I were to get unlimited wishes, among them would be to have the whole 43 episodes of the Road Runner and Wile E. Coyote cartoon series on DVD. In my lowly opinion, these are the funniest cartoons ever made. I have been enjoying watching them on YouTube which as far as I’m concerned is a very constructive way to wile away these cold snowy days of winter. However, it would sure be a lot more convenient to watch them on a TV screen rather than my laptop screen.

Now that I think about it and ponder relative to this “any wish thing”, I have doubts as to whether I would use my one wish wisely. I can picture the scenario now. Let us say that I was climbing a mountain in Tibet and as I reached the very peak above the clouds, I spied an old Guru who held all of the wisdom of the ages. As I approached him and stood in awe, he would grant only me the answer to one and only one question such as the key to world peace or the cure for any disease. I can see it now, as I stood before him in awe, I would be thinking of the one question that would benefit all mankind. Knowing myself, I would probably ask him, “Do you wear boxers or briefs?”

Alas, for the benefit of the world and all mankind, one can only hope that I would not be the very first person to stumble across that guy!

And now beloved readers, I shall go back to YouTube and watch another Road Runner and Wile E. Coyote cartoon. By the way, does anyone know what the “E.” means in Wile E. Coyote’s middle name? Aha! Now if I were to meet that Guru, I will certainly have a legitimate question to ask! Certainly, the whole world would like to know what his middle name is!
!!!Mike!!!

“Facing” The Facts

Well, as if I don’t have enough obsessions already, my twin brother got me into Facebook.com! That’s all I need are more obsessions. I’ll just have to add this latest obsession to the long list of my other obsessions including: Jeeps, horses, cats, reading, writing, boots, my web site, this Blog, pod casting, and a whole gaggle of other obsessions only my psychiatrist knows about and some even he has never heard of.

I must admit that I am really having fun in the fascinating world of on line social networking. You can check it out at www.facebook.com and look me up. I need all the Facebook friends I can get just like in real life. (I just hope I will have more success on finding Facebook friends than I do in real life.)

On second thought, it would probably be easier if you just emailed me and I will send you an invitation to join Facebook.com and then take you into my care as a Facebook friend, which involves a little less “red tape”.
Use this email to contact me with your request:
zukeyjuice-mikesblog@yahoo.com

In order to avoid overloading the Yahoo email servers with thousands of emails to me to be my Facebook friend, please use the following schedule:

For middle names beginning with A – G send your emails between 1:42 – 1:59 AM. For middle names beginning with H – L send emails between 2:06 – 2:11 AM. For middle names beginning with M – Q send emails between 2:12 – 2:19 AM. For middle names beginning with R – Z send emails between 2:21 – 3:05 AM. If you have no middle name, then send me your email requests between 3:38 – 4:01 AM.

I’ll be looking for you!

Your (future) friend?...
::M::

I Finally Found It!

No, not my sanity. Dream on fans. For quite a while, I have been trying to find free software to download YouTube videos. I finally stumbled onto something that does it on line with no software to download.

If you would like to download any YouTube video on your hard drive to save and watch anytime on your favorite media player, check out
www.zamzar.com It not only downloads on line videos from YouTube, but others as well. You can also convert any files including the weird ones such as ogg, aac, ac3, and some others I have never heard of. It converts stuff into mp3, wav, wmv, etc. It also converts all kinds of other files and does other cool stuff! Check it out! The best feature is that it is free and that is good enough for me.

(And you were thinking I never have anything useful on my Blog!)
***Mike***

Some "Juicy" Bit of News!

Now and then, I go to different stores for one reason or another. In doing so, I sometimes find items that are not stocked by the stores I normally patronize. While browsing around Drug Mart this morning I found Donald Duck brand fruit juice in a big tin can. I have not seen this since I was a kid and I assumed that they stopped making it years ago. It took me back to that time. I immediately purchased a can of it. When I am finished drinking the juice, I intent to clean out the can and keep it when I wax nostalgic, which is very often indeed.

In the world of the same old present day brands, it sure is refreshing to see a brand from my child hood for a change!

Now if I could find Bonomo Turkish Taffy, that would really make my day!

I have been having fun surfing YouTube and finding old TV commercials from my youth. To this day, I sometimes get the following song in my head and it stays there all day! It more than likely will stay in your head all day too! Remember, obsession loves company ;-) Check it out! (Note: if you do not have high speed Internet access, you will have to click on the pause button until the video loads.)

“Monopolizing” My Thoughts

I have never been, am not now, nor will ever be a “winter person”. As a result; I have been spending an inordinate amount of time inside during this cold and snowy weather.

Since I rarely watch TV, preferring to read instead, in between books, I have been spending more time on my laptop and exploring many things on the Internet. During my course of surfing, I have been checking out all the things that Yahoo offers. One section I have been camping out in has been Yahoo Games which, needless to say, has all kinds of games. One particular game that caught my attention was Monopoly. I down loaded it and played one game. After finishing it and losing, I came to the conclusion that playing electronic Monopoly is not nearly as much fun as playing on a real board with real dice, etc. This would explain why I’ve always preferred empirical items rather than electronic ones.

The computer version of Monopoly has absolutely no equal to the fun we used to have playing as kids on a real board. In the computer version one can not physically perform things such as rolling the dice and have them fall off the table. Neither can I “stash money” to later overwhelm my opponents when they think I could not afford to put hotels on Park Place and Boardwalk Ave. When I played as a kid, I would often volunteer to be the banker so I could attempt to embezzle funds. When I wasn’t the banker, I would attempt to rob the bank when my funds were low. Unfortunately I had no way to embezzle funds or rob the electronic bank.

I would invite my readers to check out the following link to one of my old stories about playing Monopoly as a kid, which will render much more detail about playing Monopoly on a real board:

http://www.quarterhorse3.us/monopolizing_our_time.html

“Opening” Remarks

I’ve noticed these days that more and more cans now have pull tab openers. First it was beverage cans that started off with pull tabs, thus making metal beverage can openers obsolete. Now it’s getting more and more evident that soon can openers will be an endangered species. In spite of the fact that the older I get, the more I resist change, this is one change that I laud. One big reason is tuna fish cans. I’ll sure be glad when they finally come with pull off tops. It has always been an irritant to me that every time I open a can of tuna, the can opener smells like tuna for weeks. Just in case you’re wondering, I always wash the opener in hot sudsy water, but it never seems to do any good until the tuna aroma finally fades away on its own. It’s like cutting onions or being sprayed by a skunk, it just takes time for the smell to pass in spite of repeated washings. The one big difference between waiting for onion smell on my hands to naturally pass is that unlike a skunk smell, I don’t lose friends. One the other hand, one consolation for skunk smell is that I can always find a back seat in church.

Since it is inevitable that in the future can openers will be obsolete, I intend to save some for posterity. In several years they are sure to be very valuable especially to a can opener collector or to someone who has old cans socked away that still need an opener.

As I get older, I get wiser. I remember when I was a kid, my grandmother was always telling me, “The things of today are the antiques of tomorrow”. I sure wished now that I would have listened to her. If I had, today I would either be very wealthy or have the biggest collection of junk in Berlin Township. Therefore, in light of that, I am starting to save things here and there that I’m sure will be “the antiques of tomorrow”. Years ago I saved a Rubik’s Cube in the box unopened because I was sure that one in that pristine state would be very valuable someday. Unfortunately, I misplaced it years ago! Oh well, whoever finds it will make a lot of money no doubt.

In order to prevent loss, I’m planning to put a few brand new can openers in their original unopened packages in my safety deposit box at the bank. I have no doubt they will be valuable someday, at least in China. I’m very pleased that I am finally getting far sighted and practical in my old age, although in the opinion of many people that’s still debatable. If I’m mistaken, at least I’ll become an expert poker player in the distant future. I’ll be able to show my “openers”. I’ll bet the other players won’t be able to do that!

~<Mike>~

Safe Bicycling

I’m making great progress on my winter exercise program on my recumbent stationary bicycle. I’m now “riding” 201 feet, 4 ½ inches, which is 0.038 miles, which sounds much further and thus much more encouraging than feet. By April 1st, I’m planning and working hard to be up to 212 feet, 2 1/8 inches which is 0.040 miles which is a nice round number and a worthy but difficult goal for me. I am confident I can reach this goal by hard work each day.

While doing research on the Internet about riding bicycles, they highly recommend wearing a bicycle helmet for riding safety. Since I do not own a bicycle helmet, I figured my motorcycle helmet would suffice. Now I can have confidence that I can ride my stationary recumbent bike in my living room in ultimate safety.

Mike ;-)

No Switch Switch

Remember in the good old days when everything had an on/off switch. However, I have noticed in the last several years that most powered things these days do not have an on/off switch. I’m sure it is obvious that this is a cost saving device used by manufacturers.

As a result of this cost cutting (i.e. cheapness), it causes a great deal of aggravation to the consumer, it least it does to THIS consumer. For example, I recently obtained a snazzy digital cooking timer which of course has no on/off switch. The directions state: "In order to save batteries when not in use, remove one of the batteries". This little marvel of Chinese engineering has 4 batteries. Removing the rear battery compartment door and removing and installing one of the batteries before and after each use is a real pain in the neck, not to mention the fingers! Part of the major conspiracy by non on/off switch manufacturers is not only putting batteries in and out before and after every use, but have you ever tried to remove battery covers. No easy task if you have very short finger nails like I do. This cooking timer has 5 different timers including one for each burner and an oven timer! This also creates a mystery as to why there are 5 separate timers and 4 batteries.

Of course we all have several things without on/off switches these days and I’m sure I am voicing universal aggravation. It wouldn’t surprise me to find that someday everything will lack an on/off switch. As far as I’m concerned that would a real emotional “turn off”. (After removing a battery of course).

M-I-K-E

For Guys Only!

If I had to surrender all of my DVDs and had the option to keep only 1 series, it would unequivocally be The Three Stooges. I have been watching them on either TV or DVD for 50 years. During this entire time, I have never tired of watching them. For the most part, all their fans have been dominated by guys. It's a "guy thing". Being such a devoted fan, I have thoroughly scrutinized every book written about them. I have an extensive Three Stooges database I have created through the years. Recently I have added some fascinating figures to my database. This is esoteric information I've always desired to know and now finally have. The following figures will be germane to us ardent fans. The following data encompasses all 190 episodes the Stooges made.

Total Face Slaps: 2,695
Total Eye Pokes: 222
Total Head "Conks": 187
Total Pies Thrown: 224
Most Slaps in one Episode: 69 (Fright Night)
Most Eye Pokes in one Episode: 11 (Woman Haters) (This figure is the most pertinent to me because this is my favorite Stooge antic)

The previous statistics are just a few of the comprehensive ones I have gathered over the course of many years.

All right guys, I know you have always wondered and now you know! Moreover, most (if not all) people say my Blog never contains anything useful! That shows what you know! Unlimited praise and adorations will be gladly accepted via any of my many email addresses.

Epilogue:
I imagine most of you lady readers are now no doubt thinking, "This stuff is atrocious"! I must point out that I had a disclaimer at the onset and I must reiterate. It's "A Guy Thing". If you ladies are really serious about trying to understanding all this, you will have to get a testosterone plus an anabolic steroid injection. BOING! Upon pondering this concluding point, at my age, I think I will get in line for one of those injections too! Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk ;-)

Mike

Electronic Apron Strings

In my last post, I mentioned schools having web sites these days. In keeping with this electronic theme, I shall now examine the subject of cell phones. I am really into all sorts of electronic gizmos these days and wished we had had them back "in my day".

However, the one exception to this desire is cell phones. Cell phones are not bad in themselves, but I was amazed to learn recently that most every kid has one. When I was a kid, the last thing I needed or desired was to have a means of communication from home. The main reason for this is due to the things I did and the places I went. For example, if I had had a cell phone at school, I would have been caught doing all kinds of "shady" things that I normally got away with.

I can imagine my mother calling me at school on my cell phone:

RING RING....... This is your mother calling. You haven't lost your lunch money have you!

Me... Absolutely not! (I would never have admitted that I lost it that morning playing marbles at recess and losing a 25 cent bet that I could roll one of my marbles and hit my opponent's marble 175 feet away).

Mom... You wore your coat outside for recess like I told you to, didn't you? You know it's -6 and the wind chill is -45

Me... Sure mom, I'm not stupid you know. (In order to impress my guy friends that I was a real man, I never wore my coat outside at recess).

Mom... Now do like I told you this morning and come straight home from school because Aunt Horetense is going to be here.

Me... I would really like to, but I asked my teacher if we both could stay after school for some private tutoring in spelling, which you know is my worse subject. (Actually, I had detention for not wearing my coat outside for recess).

Mom... Well, OK. You're such a little angel!

Me... I sure am Mom. Well the bell just rang and I wouldn't want to be late for class. Bye Bye mommy dearest. (I sure couldn't tell her I have to go and hide in the restroom during spelling which was my worse subject).

Now that I think about it, I'm sure thankful that cell phones were not invented way back "in my day".
M I K E

High Tech Homework Avoidance

Earlier today, I was doing some "spring cleaning" of all of my superfluous bookmark links. I'm sure we all have these in our web browsers. While checking all the links to see whether they were still operational, I checked out several websites I haven't been to in a long time.

One bookmarked web site I went to was our local high school. They have a great web site and I enjoyed browsing through it. It's amazing how high tech is influencing our daily lives. I pondered the pros and cons if we had had a school web site in my day. The best pro I would have enjoyed would have been sending anonymous crank emails to our high school principal and teachers. I can think of one example email I would have loved to have sent to my high school English teacher:

From: John Q. Student
To: sophie@berlinhtsschool.ed
Subject: You

Hey Sophie! I think you are too cruel to all of us students in your 4th period English class and that you are a cranky old bag. Just to really bug you, I'm going to use improper English on purpose. Heey, yu,.. eye thnk of u whenever Ie usse wrog speling or gramer. I realy lik to use dangling partysipels to. U aint never ganna know who this iss. I'm even going to give you my name and you will NEVER EVER be able to figure out who I am because I'm going to misspell it on purpose. YOU OLD BAG. HA HA!
Mikke Tillinghaste

On the con side, I noticed a section that listed homework assignments from each teacher. This would have really caused me much trouble. Since I rarely did homework, this would have nailed me for sure, because I could no longer use the lame excuse that I didn't know what the assignment was. On the other hand, since I was a genius in coming up with award winning lame excuses, I could still have circumvented the on line homework assignments. I would have said that I tried to download the homework assignment, but since I only have dial up Internet access, the assignment had not completed downloading at the time I had to leave for school.

Now that I think about it, it was probably just as well we didn't have the Internet in those days. Hence, I can honesty say that things were indeed better in the "Good Ole Days" at least as far as homework assignments go.
mike {;0)>