More Paradoxical Conclusions

In my previous Blog entry, I pondered the thesis of foods that cats desire and why they do. In this Blog entry, I will state another paradox germane to the insect kingdom.

One of my least favorite subjects has always been biology. I did not enjoy it in high school or college. However, I did have one high point in college biology class when the professor allowed us to do some independent research on the topic of our choice.

Since there was a gaggle of grasshoppers in the biology lab, I pondered experimenting to determine the auditory ability of grasshoppers. Since all kids are referred to as being "cute as a bug's ear", I was determined to test by the scientific method the thesis to determine if bugs have ears. I donned my lab coat and retrieved a grasshopper from the grasshopper hopper. I placed the grasshopper on the lab counter, clapped my hands, and yelled, "JUMP". The grasshopper jumped right off the counter. At this stage in my experiment, I observed that grasshoppers could indeed hear. I then removed its right rear leg and repeated the experiment by clapping my hands and yelling "JUMP". It still jumped off the counter. I progressed to the point where I removed the other three legs, clapped my hands, and yelled, "JUMP". This time the grasshopper remained perfectly still. I repeated the process several times by clapping my hands and yelling "JUMP". Subsequent to this experimentation, I formulated the obvious conclusion that grasshoppers in deed have ears and can hear. However, if all of their legs are removed, it causes deafness. I sent the results of my experiment to the scholarly periodical "Bug Times". Oddly enough, that was over 38 years ago and I have yet to hear from them. I'm now convinced it was just another example of professional jealousy since I was the one who first discovered this. I have since given up on any further insect experimentation after I discovered that in the field of entomology it is a "Bug eat bug" world.

Addendum: I did have dealings with grasshoppers earlier in life. These dealings can be found in the dusty archives of my old web site stories. Check this out: www.quarterhorse3.us/grasshopper.html

(()) MIKE (()) ;-o